who cares? xoxo ♥

of being a grandchild .

2011-12-24T06:11:00.000-08:00

Oh la la~ Assalamualaikum there. I’m now in my grandma’s house. She’s been sick so I’ve to take care of her. Kesian my nenek :( . Before, she used to be so active, walking here to there, making some buaian for her grandchildren (especially for me, who really loves playing it :p ), planting some rambutan, mango, mangosteen, duku, and durian trees around the house, going to a shop near the house to buy ice-cream and some sort of jajan for us and all. But now? She looks so weak and how I hope she can be as healthy as she was before. Ya Allah, please bless her, she’s the best grandmother I’ve ever had. Whenever I’m fighting with my cousins, she’s always by my side (she’d go and scold them, lucky me). Whenever I’m crying and sulking, she always buys me ice-cream to calm me down. And recently when everybody in the family (family sebelah Mama I mean) asked me to go studying medicine in Egypt, my nenek didn’t. That time, she asked me what did I like and I said engineering. So, she helped me convincing Mama to let me study Engineering. Seriously I couldn’t ask for any better grandma. Alhamdulillah, ya Allah, I’m so grateful :’) . How I hope she will recover soon. Ya Allah, I just couldn’t see her enduring any pain anymore. Give her the best health please. Mok, hope you’ll recover soon and I want you know that, I LOVE YOU and I’LL ALWAYS DO.

And yes, the emotional’s part is over. Now let me tell yousomething. This evening, I rode motorcycle with my cousin, Along. Actually I haven’t ride motorcycle for quite a long time, and just now when I did, I’m surprised that I still can ride it well. Nasib baik tak rebah okay. Seriously I really enjoyed it. Rasa macam bebas gila. Yohoooo I was like orang gila, yelling while riding it. HAHA. Although some of the villagers looked at me and my cousin with weird glances, but who cares? LOL. And here I was just like housewife. Bangun pagi-pagi, kejut budak-budak (which are my cousins) banguun pagi, kemas rumah and masak. It’s unbelievable that all the kids love my cooking. Tak sangka kan, HAHA. But my nenek said, ‘Nati sapo nikoh ngan Angah mesti sihat sokmo, sebab Angah masok tok masin etek’ [translation: Nanti siapa kahwin ngan Angah mesti selalu sihat sebab Angah selalu masak tak masin]
-_______________________- . Padahal nak cakap aku masak tawar kan HAHA T.T . My lil cousins, also, always ask me to cook desserts, as they know I love making puddings and simple cakes(selalu kena buli dengan budak-budak kecik kat sini -.-‘) And here for every meal, everyday, my aunties always ask me to cook, maybe they forget that I’m an engineering girl, not a chef. HAHA. But seriously I don’t mind at all, because in fact, I love cooking (suprised?) and yeah cooking is one of the best stress therapy okay :p . Okay then, gotta stop, my Nenek has just woke up from her sleep, so I gotta feed and clean her ^^ . Mok, cepat-cepat sembuh ye. InsyaALLAH. Please pray for her as well people, I really appreciate that, danke schön!

p/s : there's no 'P/S' today.

2x p/s : hey, doesn't that already a 'P/S' up there? -.-'

Kthen, XOXO ♥

the OLD me and a BETTER me .

2011-12-22T01:55:00.000-08:00

Tadi aku scrolled balik older posts aku. Baca dan baca dan baca. Ya ALLAH, tak maturednya aku dulu. Grammar tunggang-langgang, guna bahasa ape entah pulak tu. Ade lah jugak yang ala-ala rempit gitu. “eiii ak an da ckp ak benci k0,bleyh tk ko brambusS dri ido0p aku? pliSs get away frm my life, Im HEPPIER without you~ “, “pliS3~ jgn adew dlm ido0p saya lagi boley x?~ “ , “hari tue an, aku pegi kolumpo, lepas tu an aku an, terjumpew ….“ (dah boleh buat lagu doraemon yang ada part AN! AN! AN! tu -__________- ) . Tula some of them yang aku sempat copy paste kat sini. Ya Allah, seriously I used to be such that immature? Macam apa je kan aku dulu. Aku tahu dulu aku a bit emo, tapi tak sangka la pulak immatured. Ya Allah, malunya kat orang-orang yang baca blog aku dulu (sorok muka bawah bantal). And tak sangka, I used to use those harsh words, mcm …….. (err, tak payah contoh lah). Tak sangka aku pun dulu guna those words yang tak elok tu. Teruknya kan aku dulu. Aku yang sekarang ni sangat benci those curse words, and I really don’t get it kenapa aku dulu guna those words -__- (I think it’s an influence from Gossip Girl). HAHA. But that’s what we called LIFE. At least I’ve improved, from a bad to a better girl. Aku tahu aku yang sekrang ni pun masih banyak yang buruk, yang tak sempurna. But somehow, I’l improve myself, from time to time INSYAALLAH. Aku tahu aku yang dulu sangat emo kan, maybe sampai sekarang pun masih terbawa-bawa emo tu. Biasalah, budak baru kenal cinta masa tu, sebab tu emo HAHA. Serious rasa macam losernya Fatin Nabilah yang dulu. Biasalah, Fatin Nabilah yang sekarangkan dah 18 tahun, atau dalam kata lainnya, dah atas umur, so aku sekarang dah matured lah okayy :P

Kthen, hope from time to time, I’ll be a better girl, a better daughter, a better friend, a better student, a better blogger and the most important one is, insyaAllah I’ll be a better Muslimah, amin.

p/s: suddenly I feel like writing a post about my first hiking experience. HAHA. Because that memory is one of the best memories I’ve ever had. And it’s my first time hiking as well. Kalau ada masa, insyaAllah nanti I’ll make one bout it :D

xoxo then ♥

I give you the honour to give the tittle.

2011-12-22T00:09:00.000-08:00

Soo errr hye ! (awkward -___- ) . Assalamualaikum. Seriously, I feel so awkward since I haven’t write for quite a long time. For others, holiday is the best time to keep the blog updated. But me? I think I haven’t written any post since the holiday, am I right? (checking the blog). Oh wait! I had! I wrote a post bout 2PM before. So that means I’m not that lazy right? (#mukabangga). LOL. Oh noooo, my second sem’s going to start this January, which means I only have a week ++ at home. Cepatnya masa berlalu. And yeah I have forgotten all the german’s grammar, shame on me (mati aku kena baham dengan Herr Torsten nanti). Dahlah semua subjects pun belum habis revise. Orang lain duduk rumah memang study memanjang je kot, tapi aku? ONLINE, TIDUR, DRAMA, MAKAN, TV dan sewaktu dengannya jelah -__- . Kthen tu je. Wasted masa korang baca post ni kan. HAHA. Sapa suruh hang baca LOL. Okay pesan terakhir kepada diri sendiri, DO YOUR BEST IN 2ND SEM FATIN. You gotta do better, much much better than you had done in first sem. You played too much :( Hookay, you gotta study hard, no, I mean you gotta study harder. InsyaAllah. Pray for my results people. Though I know it won’t be 15/15 points, but I hope that it would be okay. Amin

i'm not HOT. I'm just HOTTEST .

2011-11-26T08:27:00.001-08:00

Info : HOTTEST stands for the fans of 2PM .

Tag leute . Finally 2PM's Hand's up in Malaysia is over . I'm glad that they appreciate their fans in Malaysia so much . Guess what ? OMG just now i watched the fanvids taken during the concert and it was like damn damn damn superb ! Though I dont really enjoy going to any concert, but I did really envy the HOTTEST that went there . Seriously people, going to concerts is not really that enjoyable for me . Tapi kalau orang bagi free ticket, layan je . And this is taken form Khunnie and Taec 's twitter ^^

see that see that ? that's why i'm envying the Hottest that went there . Takpelah, at least they enjoyed their tour in Malaysia . Okay then, since i'm not that sleppy yet, let me post some photos ;p

taken by Junsu when they are on their way back from Malaysia

#monolog dalaman : khunnie, please dont make that cute face in the flight or the stewardesses might fall for you -___-

OMG why do you have to be that loving ? kyakkkkkk ~~ *cairrr like a cadbury in a hot oven

Okay sekian . Dont I tell you that I'll become this ridiculous when I'm bored ?
-__________-

nota kaki : This is my first time updating this blog using my Iconia . Damn, my typing speed has become much slower and that's quite bothering me. Takpe Fatin Nabilah, practice makes perfect ! And yes, the other thing that has become quite a bothersome is, I MADE A LOT OF TYPOS ! #sigh

okay people, ich soll jetzt schlafen ! Assalamualaikum und gute nacht .

Here I Am . 4-leaves clover .

2011-11-24T09:07:00.001-08:00

signed in to twitter, suddenly feeling like stalking Nickhun's tweeter ! haha . Guess what? I found this .

Yeahhh the picture of him with the 4-leaves clover and I LOVE THE 4-LEAVES CLOVER damn damn much . HAHA . This pictures is gonna be my favourite one, seriously. It's going to be my laptop's and phone's wallpaper, gonna print this picture and put it on my wallet, seriously !

OMG how can someone be this comelllll ? Kyakkkkk . *Faint

.
.
.

When he posted this picture, he tweeted " Only You are my other half " . Wondering if i can put my right hand beside his left hand, and completing the 'heart' shape? Just if I can do that . *faint again.

Okay last one, I promise you . I know you're bored seeing just this face, but what to do, he's too perfect to be ignored.

ommonaaaa . I'm melting . *In comma *.*

Khunnie, much much love .

Song while I'm writing this : 4MEN & Mi - Here I Am ( Secret Garden OST )

p/s : I know I'm quite childish, writing bout him out of nowhere -______- . And yes, I'd prefer those unedited and non-makeup-ed photos and he doesnt have to be that flawless for me to adore him .

Okay Fatin Nabilah is now in comma.

Causes : she , accidenttally, looked at that supercute picture of Khunnie -________-

Just if I have a car .

2011-11-16T23:54:00.001-08:00

tomorrow I'll go back to my hometown YIPPEE ! Finally . And guess what? The sem break holiday is just one month and half . I know I should be grateful , not wishing for a longer holiday right -.-' And yeahh tomorrow, how am I going to LCCT? Haiyahh, takkan la nak naik KTM to KL Sentral kot? with that 3 luggage? Pheww~ never . And taxi? That'll cost me RM60 . Kalau shopping dah dapat sehelai baju dah -.-' . Terpaksalah kot naik teksi, aiyaa dah la dah pokai T.T Helfen mir ! Sesiapa ada baik tak nak bagi kereta free kat saya? Bagilah saya drive sampai Kl Sentral esok HAHA . -.-' Alhamdulillah nasib baik from KL Sentral there are buses going straight away to LCCT . Ya Allah, permudahkanlah perjalanan aku esok . Amin .

p/s : the factory visit was cancelled and because of that, I have to stay in Akasia longer. Kalau tak dah lama dah jejak kaki kat Kelantan. But it's okay, at least boleh balik kann ? :') And hope my exam's result is going to be okay. Tak gempak pun takpe, dah okay pon cukup . InsyaAllah :)

it's not goodbye .

2011-11-13T06:43:00.001-08:00

okay tomorrow I'm going to sit for my German paper - Grammar and Text Production . Alhamdulillah the Listening and Reading Comprehension part is not bad as I thought it would be . Hope I can answer tomorrow's paper , AMIN ! And the day after tomorrow, there'll be my last paper, which is Chemistry paper and yeah I'm free ! Then gonna make my way to Pahang for Factory Visit, which will be in Mercedes factory . YEAY ! Okay that's all . Still got too many things to revise . Ciao people .

Pray for me yea !

The answer for the post below .

2011-11-02T09:57:00.000-07:00

Alhamdulillah, I safely arrived in Kelantan (: Bahagia rasanya boleh jejak kaki kat Kelantan since I havent balik Kelantan for about 2 months ! And this is the answer for the below post (older post) .

HAHA . That's all, gotta rest . Assalamualaikum and Gute Nacht Leute (:

Going back to my Heimatstadt .

2011-11-02T09:53:00.000-07:00

( ignore the pilot's part HAHA xD )

Guten tag people. I'm now in the departure hall, LCCT, waiting for the always delayed AirAsia. Dear AirAsia, cant you be punctual for once? *sigh* . You know, this is my first time, flying with the AirAsia, ALONE. Yeah, without Abah. Hopefully it's going to be great. Before this, I used to take Firefly but for some reasons, I really dislike Firefly, errr their services are a bit poor, I think. So far, MAS paling okay la, tapi tiket mahal HAHA. So, for this time, I choose AirAsia, Now Everybody Can Fly *iklan jap HAHA*. So, let's proceed ! Today I'm going home, OW YEAHH ! Feels like damn heaven. Even though I'm a bit lost just now, but Alhamdulillah that doesnt ruin my HAPPY mood today. You know, from KL Sentral, to go to the LCCT Terminal Airport, I have to ride a train called KLIA Transit. So, I took that train and I didnt realise that I've to get off the train at Salak Tinggi, and I went until KLIA station. When I arrived at KLIA, that's when I realised that I've been at the wrong airport -.-' . So, I took the train back to Salak Tinggi and took the bus to LCCT . A very tiring journey . And after that, saya punye tapak kasut pulak tercabut! Nasib baik boleh jalan lagi. Dear shoe, tak boleh ke awak nak rosak hari lain? Like, damn huh? And then, arrived at the airport, I went and checked in at the counter. I didnt know that I've to pay for my luggage ( if Firefly or MAS, you doesnt have to pay for your luggage, except if your luggage is over the limit ). Luckily ada duit time tu. I paid RM55 just now for check in and luggage. Pokai jap T.T . Then I bought Sushi and Famous Amos for my adikss (: Even though many bad things happened today, but still, I'M DAMN DAMN DAMN HAPPY because in less than two hours, I can hug and kiss MAMA ! yeayyy ! ^^ . Okay then, looks like the aeroplane AK5924 to Kota Bharu has arrived ! At last ! And the pictures below are taken in this LCCT departure hall using the webcam. People around me is looking at me, with their weird faces. For sure diorang fikir, ' buat ape la budak ni senyum sorang2 depan laptop' ! HAHA . But who cares right?

BELOW : muka budak takde kerja tengah tunggu AirAsia selalu lambat -.-' [ taken with WEBCAM, that's why the quality is poor -.-' ]

( my boarding pass :D )

(okay saja besarkan mata sebab taknak bagi nampak sepet HAHA)

(gambar takleh blah -.-' )

p/s : buruk pun buruk la, nak upload jugak ! HAHA . The most obvious thing in my face is, that panda eyes. My eyes are getting worse, the eyebags are becoming darker and darker . And, I do look like makcik right . But again, who cares ? xoxo .

damn noisy class with the CS thing .

2011-10-24T00:21:00.000-07:00

Guten Tag people . I'm now in class, facing the laptop, thinking what should I write here, while a bunch of Hausafgaben (read : homeworks) is waving to me, asking me when they'll be finished. Okay life's getting busy and busier and the final exam is just 3 weeks away. The guys are playing their laptop, making the class a havoc. Sangat dan terlampau bising. They're playing CS i think. Cool much huh? The exam is just around the corner, but they are playing the game. Untunglaa genius. Seriously i think everyone in my class is a genius, EXCEPT me . Yeah, exclude me bitte . Even if they're so sempoi all the time, tapi result semua gempak. Okay jeles. and among all of the students in Konstanz (my class name) , I think , I'm the stupidest one. Even the girls, among the ten of us, I'm the most sucks one. Yeah, TEN. Zehn. There are only ten girls in A-Level German course, with the other 47 boys. Bosan right ? Oh how I miss the suasana in my former school and classes. I miss the UA's gene, 4US and 5US . No boys and all girls . Sangat dan tersangat best. I miss Naimians, seriously I did. Just if I could turn the time back, I will appreciate every single moment with them . And now , I understand the feeling that people always told us, ' You will miss your secondary school the most' .

But still, Intec is great with great people ! Having opportunities to know most of them are wonderful. Especially the ten ALG girls, Farah, Diyanah, Wani, Faa, Ain selendang, Ainmas, Salehah, Waitheng and Yeeling. And the ALG guys are okay laa, except for SOME of them. Yea, just some . A little portion of the guys. And the other people from other courses, as well. Here, I joined HACC, the hiking club in INTEC . Best woo pergi hiking as it was my first experience going hiking a mountain. The best memory, EVER ! Okay now, gotta solat, before the break ends. So, let the pictures talk okay ! (notice : the pictures are chosen randomly, so no offense yea (:

summary of what's going on in my life lately, even it's just some of them

INTERNATIONAL FOOD FESTIVAL ( the A-level German students sold Germany's foods on that day ! the food is bombastic ! )

( The man is my German's lecturer, Herr Torsten Schaar and that lovely woman is Frau Maria)

INPRO ( one of the biggest event in INTEC ! kind of hari sukan among the courses in INTEC ~ A-level German, A-Level Medic, A-Level UK, Australian Matric, American Dgree Foundation Program, Korea & Japan Prog, Middle East Prog, Russian Prog, Music Faculty)

( posing with germany's flag dluh )

guess what ? All of the ALG's girls had to wear that kembang-kembang skirt to dance. Like hell. Memalukan T.T and even though we didnt win, but still, it'll always stay in heart, FOREVER . ^^

BBQ night ( to kenal-kenal between the seniors and juniors )

okay xde pun kan gmba yang ber-BBQ. just got the tiup-tiup belon one -_-

ALG Grand Annual Dinner

( okay muka budak excited dapat helium ballon -.-' ) #farah in blue shawl, and black one is me .

(Ain, Kiameng, Farah, Budaktaktahunama) #thanks Kiameng for keeping me a company (:

the dinner was okay, except for my spoiled mood . added bcause of the temporary missing my beloved DSLR . and scolded by THAT ONE . okay enough, yang lepas lepaslah even rasa itu masih ada.

So, that's all . terlampau panjangkan kan kan post ni . biarla, belog saya. Ada kesah ? Who cares btw ? XOXO . till we meet again. Assalamualaikum .

First post in German and dont laugh .

2011-10-22T21:40:00.000-07:00

Tag people. Ich will in Deutsch heute schreiben. Ich bin jetzt im Mc'D. Jetzt gleich, bin ich mit meinen Freundinnen, Farah und Diyanah, aber jetzt ich bin allein. Schade ! Ich soll studieren aber ich bin faul. Ich mochte lange Facebooken, Twittered und Bloggered. Yea, ich weißt, dass ich dumm bin. In 3 Wochen muss ich fur meine Finale Prufung ablegen . Wunscht mir Gluck. Ich bin nicht gut in Deutsch, Physik und Chemie aber ich muss fleißig studieren ! Ich muss nach Deutschland fliegen ! Beten Sie fur mich bitte !

p/s : i think nobody understand my sentences up there right ? Schade ! I'm really not good in German :( Grammar tunggang-langgang and saya memang malas nak bukak googgle translate. Salah pon salah laa T.T and yeah, sorry for the missing umlaut, malas nak google and copy and paste. And for those who learnt Deutsch, correct me if I'm wrong . I'm okay with that (:

Winners Never Quit, and Quitters Never Win. - Vince Lombardi

DONT GIVE UP FATIN. DONT AND NEVER EVER. I BELIEVE THAT YOU'RE A STRONG GIRL .

schwach .

2011-10-22T20:59:00.000-07:00

Aku yang lemah. Aku yang hina. Aku yang tak pandai (mama saya marah kalau sebut bodoh) . Aku yang tak sempurna. Terasa kerdil tatkala dibandingkan dengan orang lain. Yeah,i'm not a smart student, not a good friend, not a religious muslimah and not a kind daughter. Aku terbuka blog dia. He seems like an annoying person, seriously annoying. But once i clicked on his blog, then that's when i see another side of him. Ya allah, kerdilnya aku. I need to change. No, i've to change. ICH MUSS ANDERN. Into a better me, a better Fatin Nabilah . InsyaALLAH, i will.

p/s : need you to guide me to be a better girl. Ich mochte ein besser Madchen werden (grammar German tunggang-langgang -.-')

“….Sesungguhnya Allah tidak akan mengubah nasib sesuatu kaum itu sehingga mereka sendiri mengubah nasib mereka….” (Ar-Ra’du:11) .

dont .

2011-10-06T00:54:00.003-07:00

hai . saya nak cakap saya bosan . okay bye .

-___________________________________-

my dad is always better than your dad .

2011-06-19T12:30:00.000-07:00

my angels. ILY abah. ILY mama.

The title sounds a lil bit snobbish doesn’t it? Haha. Just don’t give a damn. As today is father’s day ( okay it’s actually yesterday because it’s past midnight now, but still I’m going to make a father’s day post LOL) . Err actually just now, I went outta my room sebab nak pergi dapur ambik aiskrim. Hehe. (ohmyyygucci, u eat ice-cream at this hour? This late? No wonder lah u gemuk HAHA). Btw, who cares? Gemuk pun gemuk la, as long as I'm happy and perut pun terisi HAHA. So walking outta my room, coincidentally I met Abah. OMG, apa nak buat ni? Because I know Abah very well, we’ll always get potpet-potpet by him if we sleep late. And I’m always the one yang kena potpet-potpet because usually I’m the last one that sleeps in my family. That’s why Mama calls me, ‘Guard of the House’. Haha. So, as expected, Abah nagged don’t sleep late and yada yada yada. And I as usual, just tersengih-sengih macam kerang busuk and make some cute faces. Hihi. Luckily that tactic’s always make Abah just shut his mouth down. Haha. Then, catching a glimpse that I was taking the ice-cream out of the fridge, Abah terus potpet-potpet balik. He said tak baik makan aiskrim malam-malam, but that was the typical me, always being stubborn. Buat derk je. because this is aiskrim Abah, I'd die if I don't eat it (oke metafora semata-mata) But, that’s my Abah. Even he likes nagging so much, but I LOVE HIM. I LOVE HIM LIKE DAMN MUCH. Wanna know why ? because…..

#1 Even though he’s always over-protective, but I love the way he takes care of me.

#2 Seriously, he’s very sporting, just letting me do the things just the way I want to, but if I get out of the right way, he’ll teach me on how to be on the right track back.

#3 Abah’s always backing me up. He’ll always be my backbone whenever I'm weak and fragile.

#4 Abah loves the daughters so much. Hehe. Pity the sons right? But still, it’s still fair la, sebab Mama‘s always by the sons’ side. Hoho

#5 Abah always buys chocolate for us, especially when he come back from the outstations. He always knows our favorites which are Kinder Bueno and Ferrero Rocher. (dah la anak perempuan tengah dia ni hantu choc HAHA)

#6 Without him, there’ll be no NUR FATIN NABILAH BT AHMAD YANI that born on 29^th August 1993 in this world. Lol :p

#7 He very rarely scold me. Teheee. Rasenye, dalam setahun tu ade la sekali or dua kali kot. And tu pun at times bila aku buat kesalahan yang mandatory. Haha. And of course, he never slap or hit or whatsoever his children although he’s quite short-tempered, hoho. Memang teramat jarang kena marah sama Abah, I guess he’s well informed that his Angah is quite sensitive okay. Normally even kena marah sikit pun dah merah mata. Okay tak malu perangai haperr la macam ni -,-'

#8 He’s my imam, my guardian, my angel, my protector, my backbone, my teacher, my leader, my counselor, my money supplier, my pharmacist, my driver, my policeman, my bodyguard, my encyclopedia, my moving newspaper, my chef, my supporter, my nagger and to be exact, ABAH IS MY EVERYTHING. Just if you know how much I love you. (MONEY SUPPLIER tu yang penting tu, tehee ;p)

#9 He always supports me in whatever I love to do. When I said, ‘Abah, I want a DSLR. Nak try explore photography’ , then, he bought me a NIKON D3100. When I said, ‘Abah, I want that’ , then he’ll try his best to get that thing. And when I said, ‘Abah, I wanna be an engineer. I really want to. I don’t wanna be a doctor’ , then he said, ‘ Then go on. Just don’t care of what people said. Mulut orang tak boleh nak tutup. U just be what u want to, because I believe that’s the best for you. Tak guna jugak kalau ambik kerjaya yang tak minat. Just get through all this, and prove to the people that U CAN BE AN ENGINEER’. Terharu okay bila Abah betul-betul sokong aku untuk jadi engineer, even Mama pun menentang and keep insisting me to go to Egypt and study Medic there. But, luckily Abah understands that I really really really wanna be an engineer, so he persuaded Mama. And Mama selaku isteri solehah katanya, hanya menurut perintah Abah. Thanks Abah, u understand me the most !

#10 No matter how good or bad the people said he is, but I’ll always love him, just the way he is. I LOVE YOU ABAH, nothing can change that, insyaallah.

Thank you Allah for giving me the best abah ever and ever. Giving me a man that can protect me, guide me to the right way and shape me to what I am now. Semoga Allah sentiasa memberkati Abah dan semoga Abah panjang umur. Thank you abah. And not forgotten, I love Mama too ;)

Last word from your Angah,

HAPPY ABAH’S DAY !!!!! saranghae, aishiteru, ich liebe dich, uhibbuki, main tumse pyar karta ho, ti amo, mahal na mahal kita, pom rak khun, je t’aime . insyaallah I’ll struggle hard to become a successful engineer, just as u wish. Yes, I will prove to the people that I can be an engineer, even though I’m a girl. I’ll make u proud of me. LOVE YOU MAMA AND ABAH :)

p/s : errr actually I want a HTC smart phone. Tapi macam tak sanggup nak mintak ngan Abah. Felt like dah banyak sangat susahkan dia. Tsktsktsk. Saba c10. Kumpul duit sendiri. Ko kan da besa. Berdikari please~~~ (rolling eyes T.T)

the reds : me, abah, kaklang, abang chik, imin.

and for the father's day celeb, let's enjoy Matluthfi's video titled PERIHAL BAPA . The things that he said bout the father are sooo true.

Some catchy words in this videos :

" Aku buat apa-apa pun mesti dia suspek macam aku buat jenayah." (sebenarnya dia protective that's why dia lagu tu )

"Hang jangan kawan sangat dengan pompuan, nanti dia buat apa-apa dekat hang. Hang taktau pompuan ni dia boleh buat-buat rapat dengan hang. Dia mesej hang macam yang hang tengah buat sekarang ni. Pastu dia jumpak hang, pastu dia buat benda tak senonoh dengan lelaki lain, pastu dia suruh hang bertanggungjawab." (haha okay serious lucu gila ayah mat luthfi ni)

"Hang taktau. Abah makan garam banyak daripada hang. Kalau tak, abah tak kena darah tinggi la."

"beli kegheta beli ghumah nanti girlfriend cari hang. Hahha"

"Dads are often overprotective and somewhat annoying. But do you think you can be who you are now without him?"

The last part is quite touching when the friend of him said " aku tahu la. Aku dah 12 tahun jadi ayah kepada adik-adik aku" if it's true dude, then aku memang salute ah. Ko memang tabah. Memang salute ko bro if that last sentence is true :')

lastly, thanks Matluthfi for always made me thinking of even something that's so remeh temeh. You're great dude ;) Thanks for always inspiring me .

without words .

2011-06-18T08:26:00.000-07:00

Err , hi universe. It’s been a lonnnggg time since this damn blog updated right ? sigh, blame it on this blog’s ~~gorgeous~~ lazy owner. She seemed the so called busy lately. Err wait. Busy? Busy with the sleeping-eating-facebooking-skyping-wastingtime things I bet. Haha. Okay, i’m writing this post for only 4 minutes but it seems now I lost the word already. Ain’t got any idea mehh. Haishh the typical me, always lack of ideas. *sigh*

So now I think I should be telling you on how my life’s doing. Got nothing much actually. I just got a REALLY REALLY REALLY (read : REALLY for 100 times :p) ~~hectic~~ boring life. And it seems now most of my friends are pursuing their studies in the universities already, leaving me behind. They’ve got new and better friends already I bet. Oke sedih. Hopefully korang will never forget me okay :’) Seriously now, feels like bosan bosan bosan gile at home. Just keep doing the same boring routines every day. And this boring-ness leads me to write a post here. Heheh. Did u really have to say it Fatin Nabilah ? -.-‘

When I went to the kenduri and any gathering, people keep asking me the same question : ‘kenapa tak masuk U lagi? Bukan semua orang dah masuk U ker? Ooo ni mesti tak dapat tawaran apa-apa lagi kan?’ and everytime that question asked, I’ll just smiled and said ‘Taklah. Sekarang ni duk tunggu masa nak pergi je.’ Feels like jenuh already answering that question tapi wat rilek je. Haha.

So err let’s proceed. Actually there’s two more weeks left before I’ll leave to the International Education College (INTEC) and the registration date will be on 3^rd July. Alhamdulillah, I was accepted there under the MARA scholarship. Terimakasih, thank u, arigatoo, syukran, kasahamnida, tazen danke Encik MARA for giving me this chance ;) Insyaallah I’ll use it wisely and grab this opportunity to realize my dream to be an ENGINEER. Insyaallah.

Actually, I planned to go to University Malaya (PASUM) as I was accepted there, offering the Foundation of Physical Science course there. But when the MARA offer came, I discussed it well with my family, and Abah insisted me to grab the MARA offer, though some of my family did not support me at first. And Alhamdulillah, as the time passed by, there seems no more objections from them :)

And bout the matriculation, I was accepted to the Kolej Matrikulasi Kedah but I rejected it. Haishh so malas la to study there because most of the seniors said that it’s quite hard. Erkk macam la A-level senang kan. If I’m not mistaken, the syllabus of the A-level subjects is VERY HARD. Even harder than the International Bachelorette (IB) ‘s syllabus. Highlight that. But they said compared to A-level, IB is harder for students to score and fly. Kind of a lil bit relieved haha. Btw, I’m not sure I can carry them on or not, hope I’ll. Be optimistic girl !

Hope that I’ve made a right decision Ya Allah. Mintakmintak la ni la jalan yang terbaik bagi aku. Taking this A-level programme so that I can further my study in the Engineering course in Germany later. Hope that I’ll succeed. Pray for me ya ! for those friends yang sedang study di mana-mana U skali pun, GUDLUCK to you. VEIN GLUCK. Do your best and tebus balik result SPM okay bagi yang tak puas hati tu. Haha. Even ramai kawankawan cakap ‘waa best ko tau tak life kat U ni’ , u guys cannot leka okay. No matter what, make your dream as a reality. Study baikbaik okay sayangs sekalian. Gotta chow. Tatatititutu ~

p/s : teramat jeles bila ramai kawankawan cakap best life kat U . wondering how my U life will be. Hope that it’ll be great . Hope that I don’t have to study all the time there and be stressed just like SPM :)

xoxo ♥

Sadness, unconsciousness and passport.

2011-05-04T09:29:00.000-07:00

Hi people. Feels that it’s weird much because my blog update appears in your blog feeds? Don’t worry people. It wasn’t that you have the eye problem. It’s just because I just feel like updating this WHO CARES? XOXO today. Hihi.

So, today I went to the Wisma Persekutuan with Mama to make a passport for me. Actually I had planned to go shopping (or in Dnin’s dictionary, it’s called, shopPINK) with some of my second girlfriends *my first girlfriends the 7^th girls and naimians haha :p* . But it turned out that I HAD to make the passport because it’s urgent and I had to make it TODAY. So, the planned was putted off and we will go shopping at the Pengkalan Kubor TOMORROW! What the hell..o , tak sabanya ! hihi.

Okay dah lari tajuk. Sebenarnya aku nak cerita pasal kat Wisma tadi. Okee, kat mane tadi eh? Oh, so arrived there, kitorang terus naik Level 2 which is the Pejabat Imegresen. Finished filling the form, I went to the i-don’t-care-kaunter-berapa tu, for the thumbprint and yada yada yada.. Then makcik tu pon cakap, ‘oke mama g la duduk dulu. Biya adik jah tunggu sini. Ado adik keno thumbprint pahni’ *wow she called me ADIK. Oke rasa muda kejap. Lol* . then aku tunggu la kat situ, then a guy datang kat kaunter tu and bagi apa ntah kat makcik tu. That time, tiba-tiba aku rasa tak sedap badan. Rasa macam pening. Rasa macam where the hell am I? Siapa yang kat depan aku nih? Okay serious masa tu rasa macam blurr and nak pengsan. Aku nak try cakap ‘makcik, saya nak duduk kejap eh’ tapi ayat tu tak terkeluar. And one second later, aku pun start tak sedarkan diri, and lalu ~~pengsan~~ pitam la. Gila kecoh masa tu, semua orang kat situ dengan penuh bersemangat tengok drama tak bersiri aku and at that time, aku just dengar suara mama panggil ‘Angah, angah ‘. Masa tu, aku pon kurang pasti siapa yang sambut aku, Cuma yang pasti, it wanst mama sebab mama duduk jauh time tu. Then mama pun datang, letak aku atas kerusi. Then I was babbling like yada yada yada, and mama urut-urut aku. Lepas tu, baru la aku sedar yang I was nearly fainted just now. Okay serious masa tu rasa macam famous sebab semua orang tengok and tanya adik okey ko? Bakpo ni? Nak panggil doc ko? I was like err, takpolah pakcik. Saya oke doh ni. Then ada satu family ni duk tengok-tengok, tunjuk-tunjuk and seluruh family tu tengok aku with serious face *dah la satu family tengok. Ko ingat aku tak perasan ke? Haha* rasa malu gila kot and seriously rasa macam dalam movie, ada pitam-pitam gitu. Haha.

Pastu mama pon pergi la beli 100plus and after drinking it, Alhamdulillah, I felt much better. Disebabkan masa yang perlu ditunggu untuk siapkan passport itu adalah 1jam, so mama cakap, she’ll go first to make the Bank Draft. She asked me to wait there and siap pesan lagi, jangan pergi mana-mana, duk sini je okay. Jangan berdiri pon. Haha. Padahal pitam jer kot. Tunggu punya tunggu tu, then tiba-tiba a guy datang duduk belakang kerusi aku, and tanya

He: okay doh ko?
me: err, aah. Rasa macam okay doh. *smile* *dalam hati: ehh dio napok ko aku nak pengsan sakni? Oke malu*
he: bakpo? Tak makan ko pagi takdi?
me: eh makan doh, tapi tak tahu la bkpo skni.
he: oh, darah rendah kot. Takpolah makan daging banyak la deh.
me: haha okay. Ye kot darah rendah.
he: adik ni wat passport nak g mano? *ADIK lagi. yeah terbukti aku awet muda.kihkihkih*
me: err, nak apply study kat Mesir. Tok tahu lagi buleh ko dok pgap.
he: ohh saya pelajar mesir jugak. Ni mari nak baru passport sebab nak g Mesir mula nanti. Ni pun balik sebab rusuhan hari tu.
me: oh, amik perubatan ko?
he: eh dok la. Amik usuluddin kat Al-Azhar.
*AND DIA DUK CERITA PASAL STUDENT’S LIFE KAT MESIR.*

*DALAM HATI : EHH DIO NI. AKU DUK PENING NI BULEH PULAK DIO NAK STORY MACAM-MACAM. BUT WHAT TO DO, AKU JUST SENGIH JE LA. HAHA*

Me: ohh, ramai jugak dlu senior kat Tanta .

Dia pon belek-belek telefon and cakap, ‘ni banyak ni no doctor kat sano. Kalu nak tanyo gapo-gapo pasal Tanta boleh la'. Aku pon ‘ehh xpola. Takpo tok bagi pun *smile* ' and terus hadap depan. That time, aku pun fulfill la borang ape entah. Then dia pon panggil 'ehh ehh' and bagi kertas sehelai, ‘Nah ambik la. Ni website untuk student Kelate huk duk kat mesir and ni no telefon doctor-doktor kalu nak tanyo gapo-gapo ko’ . Aishh nasib baik takde no dia dalam tu, kalau tak, memang aku koyak depan-depan la kertas tu. Haha. 'ohh trimo kasih banyok la deh. siap tulis bena. thanks deh' *smile koyakoya excited* haha.‘takpo lah, nnti kalu buleh g ngaji sano sungguh, Insyaallah kitorang la sambut nanti, sebab saya ni salah sore AJK sambut pelajar Malaysia. Nanti buleh jupo lagi sano. Ni namo gapo ni? Seney kalu jupo nanti.’ So I told my name and dalam hati, dio ni wat aku mace confirm jah buleh sapa Mesir.

And I just continued fulfilling that form and makcik yang buat passport aku tu pon panggil. Padahal tak sampai satu jam lagi. Even that guy tadi pun siap lambat dari aku. Ni satu lagi specialty yang dapat sebab pitam tadi. Hihi. Then makcik tu suruh pergi ambik no giliran untuk ambik passport tu. And memang ramai la yang ada kat situ untuk ambik no. giliran. And ketika mama terkapai-kapai nak ambik no giliran tu, tiba-tiba that guy yang tadi pun cakap, ‘eh, takpo la. Ambik no. giliran saya takpo. Nah, saya g ambik yang lain’ . lalu dia pun pergi balik dalam kesesakan ramai untuk ambik no giliran yang lain untuk dia. Dalam hati : woow biya betul. Baik molep dio ni. Haha. Then masa tunggu giliran tu, mama and that guy pon borak-borak la, cakap pasal Mesir. Aku just senyap je, sebab masa tu pening balik. Then smpai la giliran kitorang, pergi la ambik passport tu. And after giving the last smile to that guy, sebab banyak tolong aku , aku terus blah.

Atas lif, mama tanya la siapa that guy, aku cakap aku tak kenal pun sape. Dia banyak bagi info pasal Mesir. And GUESS WHAT MAMA CAKAP ? MAMA CAKAP… MAMA CAKAP ….

mama : laki tu sakni la huk sambut Angah masa nak reboh skni mugo dio huk dekat skali. Dio la huk pegang Angah sakni .
aku: heh? Dio ko? Sungguh eh mama tok nipu? *muka terkejut itik. *dalam hati: ohh dio la ore huk duk tepi aku sakni huk duk bagi something ko makcik tu!*

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Oke tobat eh malu giler. Malu babe malu ! kau tahu tak aku malu? DAH LA PELAJAR USULUDDIN MESIR . DOH LA JURUH PAKA PIOH. KECEK PON XTENGOK MATO. JURUH OH !URGHH MALUUUU XLEH OYAK KOKRE. Ya ALLAH, kalu la aku tahu dio huk tolong sambut aku sakni, tobat aku tok kecek doh ngan dio skni! Urghhhhh. Urghhhhhh. Urghhhh !

tapi mikir-mikir balik, nasib baik dia ada kat situ kalau tak wajib aku terlentang atas mozek kat wisma tu, tak pasal-pasal kena masuk HUSM . tapi, kenapa dia? KENAPA? KENAPA? Kenapa tak sorang makcik ke? eh jap, TAK BERDOSA kan sebab dia just pegang aku untuk elakkan aku dari jatuh. KAN? bukan atas sebab lain pon. keadaan darurat tu beb, bukan saja-saja. YA ALLAH WHAT HAVE I DONE. kenapa la nak pitam time tu? Urghhh oke sekarang dah bertambah sebab kenapa aku taknak pergi Mesir, aku taknak jumpa that guy lagi. That’s it. Taknak. Sebab? Aku malu. Fullstop.

p/s : mama cakap, tu la mujur tak jadi pergi pengkalan kubor hari ni kalau tak pengsan kat situ kan susah. Hihi

one more p/s : last word, SRNBO ! urghhhh T___T *hanya komuniti skype saya yang faham apa itu SRNBO. Haha * T_______T

conclusion : mama dah tak bagi stay up lambat-lambat sampai pukul 4 dah. hurmmm oke sedih.. xoxo ♥

with tittle or without ?

2011-04-09T12:37:00.000-07:00

..........................................................................................................................
got nothing to say. I'm totally speechless. s p e e c h l e s s . . . . . . .
teganya kan? sanggupnya kan? mungkin awak fikir, bahawa hanya awak yang mempunyai hati dan perasaan. Mungkin awak terlupa yang saya juga mempunyai hati dan perasaan. Even a word can cause thousands scratches in my heart. No matter what, I'm still a girl. A human. that own an organ called heart given by ALLAH. Maybe u've forgot that fact sebab dah lame tak pegang buku bio. Mungkin. Takpe lah. Lagipun ni hati saya kan. Buat apa orang lain nak jaga kan.. Cukuplah. cukup. enough with that. Mungkin awak fikir saya kuat . Yeah, everything is just MUNGKIN .
Btw, am I that annoying that u would announce to the world of how annoying I am? I guess the answer is YES, kau memang annoying Nur Fatin Nabilah. YES YOU ARE .

Selingan di bawah tiada sebarang kaitan dengan post yang di atas . Just some of the lyrics .

Biarkan waktu teruslah berputar

Mencintai kamu penuh rasa sabar

Meski sakit hati ini kau tinggalkan

Ku ikhlas tuk bertahan

Cintaku padamu begitu besar

Namun kau tak pernah bisa merasakan

Malah kini kau ucapkan selamat tinggal

Membuat keresahan

p/s : Even my lips is always smiling and my words are always filled by the laughter, no one will EVER knows the things that deep inside my heart. That's it. Tak perlu bertanya. I wont spill it out .

2 p/s : lirik lagu hanyalah untuk memanjangkan post harap maklum .

LAST WORD, teganya kan ?

the mom and daughter talk .

2011-04-01T10:06:00.000-07:00

hi peeps and manusia sekalian alam :)

Err okay. Takdi pegi ade seminar ape ntah kat renaissance bout the medic at Mesir. Aku, Pia, Aman pegi lah kan. Saje je actually. Tak tahu la macam mana bole tgerak hati nak pegi tu =.= Gile ngantuk duk dalam tu. Nasib baik xnero jah haha. Oke tak lucu =.=

And after that seminar, I went to the Intermediate Conversation class at CLC . At first, I thought Mai will join that class too, but she didnt . Doh la Pia ngan Amani ponteng jugak. I was like errr.. sorey doh la hari ni T.T But I was wrong, ado la jugak sorey duo huk kenal. Dlam hati, fuhhh mujo.. Then guess what, Teacher Lenlen yang ajar kitorang takdi. I was like err. teacher len? alaa nak techer JAN ! okee chop. Tknak cakap apeape dah. korang pahampaham sendiri la ye knape aku nak teacher Jan. haha T__T

Then habis kelas tu macam biasa mama dtg ambik then aku drive. Dah la Harrier. Gile takut nk drive. But u know me. Cool gituh. Wat rilek je la. HAHA oke prase doh . Then atas kereta tu, tibatiba mama potpet potpet bout my cousin. He wants to get married, but his dad didnt approve his lover.*pity him * Err his dad tu my uncle la. My uncle said dia taknak menantu yang tak kerja. Sebab takut anak dia tak mampu nak tanggung family sorangsorang nanti. So that's how the conflict starts. Sian kan kat spupu saya tu, nak mendirikan msjid pun dapat halangan. Salah ke kalau wife dia tu jadi housewife je? Then tibetibe teringat laa ape yang kawankwan laki aku cakap dulu :

' nanti nok nikoh nak cari wife huk tak kijo, jadi housewife jah'
'xsey eh pompuan huk bkerjaya. tokdei caro ko husband and anakanak'
' kalu husband kijo, wife kijo, nok jupo maso bilo la ? tok bahagio'
*most of the boys la yang cakap gni*

haha funny enough. Then girls pulak bantah,

'oloh ore pue bkerjaya la baru hebat. Kito nak shopping xsey guno duit husband'
' oloh kito nk kijo pon sebab nak support husband, dey takdok duit gak nok saloh kito laa'
' takleh kito keno kijo. Ganogano pon keno kijo. Gano nanti kalu husband tinggal kito, cari ore laen. Nok hidup gano. Laki bukey buleh harap. Baru la merana kito time tu '
*i'm sure most of the women agree bout this*

HAHA. Lucu la korang. We are just EIGHTEEN ! not TWENTY-EIGHT . It's not the time to think bout that thing yet. hhaha :p

ANDDD when mama talked bout my cousin's thing, suddenly the topic bout me and the coupling thing popped out.

MAMA : gini la anok loni. toksei denga huk makayah oyak.
ME : eh eh. ore tok gitu mama. ore nok huk mama abah cari jah. heee
MAMA : haha yolo. tengok tengok mama xdei cari ado doh pahni.
ME : aishh ore gewe pon toksey mama. ore nok huk mama abah cari jah ! haha
MAMA : aishh bakpo gitunyo. Cari la sediri nanti g U nanti.
ME : ehh tokleh ma. Ore nak concentrate study jah. xsey caro ko halhal gini.

MAMA : aishh xleh gtu angah. Kalu jupo huk molek gak tak yoh tunggu mama la. Nok nanti ko mama cari pon susoh jugok. Tengok mama ngan abah. Jupo kat U jugok. Maso samosamo ngaji kat Indon dulu. Angah pon kalu jupo nnti study pon takpo la.
ME : ehh ore toksey. Tok minat couple2. Lamo kei laroo, tok ingt ko ngaji doh

MAMA: oloh ore bukey nyo suruh gewe kokse2. Ore wat gewe tu jadi pendorong semangat. Biya duo duo study. Pahtu nanti buleh doh kenal ko mama. haha
ME : oloh mama. *haha then i just laugh

MAMA : angah tok rajin ko?
ME : rajin gapo mama ? *lampii =.=
MAMA : rajin gewe?
ME : aishh mano rajin ore. oyak doh kei. ore tok main gewe2 ni..
MAMA : yolo ko? *muko tok cayo -.-
ME : hom la mama. sugguh eh tok rajin.

MAMA : haha yolo ko angah ni. saem2 ado huk gewe?
ME : suggoh eh . saem ore ado jugok huk gewe sorey duo. tapi last2 putus jugok. baik xpayoh. ore ngan saem2 ore pege prinsip doh ma, 'first love tu keno jadi husband' *tringat prinsip aku, anan and sep 5KAMI dlu*
MAMA : yolo2. ore tokleh gewe maso skoloh. tok matured lagi blako. tgok mace kak long. sebab tu mama bagi dio ngan syahrir sebab dio besa doh. reti miki doh. tahan ko dok tahu prinsip tu. padahal g U pahni gewe blako. Angah nk cari, cari huk juruh deh. jange cari huk nanar kokse.
ME : oloh mama. kaklong dlu couple maso form 5 jugok. haha -.- tahu la ma hok tu. wajib doh ore cari huk juruh. mama gak. haha
MAMA : angah dey jupo kenal dulu deh ko mama. *mama slalu pesan yang ni. kalu couple WAJIB kenal kat die. haha*

Then sampai kat rumah. At that time, lega gile dah sampai. Kalau tak, aishhh mampus la nak jawab soalan2 mama tu. HAHA. Mama pelik kan. Saya suruh dia cari, dia taknak. Dia cakap cari sendiri. Dia taknak paksa anak2 dia. Yang penting, she asked me to find that one nnti U. I still remember, masa form 4, mama ade cakap, ' tak salah nak fall in love ko gapo. Sebab mama pun dulu gtu. Ado crush mace2. Mama pehe sangat. Tapi angah jange duk leka la study. Keno pndai balance' *actually mama cakap gni maso form4 sebab dia syak aku couple time tu HAHA*. Actually, I just felt a bit weird talking bout this with mama. We rarely talk bout this . HAHA. Tapi aku bersyukur sgt. Sebab aku rasa mama sporting sangat. Dia macam rileks je kalau bab2 ni.
Baiklah mama. nnti angah jupo, angah kenalkan kat mama okay. HAHA. Thanks for always supporting me and always been there for me. Tapi aku nak tanya satu benda, memang semua ibu macam ni eh? Suruh anak dia cari mr. right kat U ? haha.

p/s : ow yeah ! the 'LIKE' button jadi doh. HOOORAY ! credit to , Hiruga Hafiidz yang ajar . Trimas ! Finally jadi doh. Lamo doh bena nak buat tapi xreti. HAHA =.=

p/s p/s : tomorrow i got the graduation day at PTBN organised by SMKA NAIM LILBANAT. hailaa malasnya nak pegi. Takpe la. babai .

NYTE PEOPLE !

xoxo ♥

step by step .

2011-03-25T12:01:00.000-07:00

hari ni i felt a bit better. Better than yesterday at least. I'm not crying like h*ll anymore. Thanks guys yang dah banyak bantu saya. bagi katakata semangat. Selalu suruh jadi kuat. Cakap yang saya tak keseorangan mghadapi dugaan ni. Thanks friends. I love all of you. At least I know there are friends by my side whenever i feel gloomy. Tadi ada conversation class kat CLC. Alhamdulillah, lepas kelas tu saya macam jadi okey sikit. Boleh bergalokss bersama sep ni memang detik yang terbaik woott ! Memang gempak gempita dalam kelas Teacher Zen tadi. And I was like, thanks Allah, sekurang kurangnya kawan-kawan saya pun sudah tak moody sangat. Syukur syukur. Sekurang kurangnya kami dah mula terima qada dan qadar Mu ya Allah.

And a big thanks jugak kepada Precious Friendship English Camp group in facebook. Memang malam malam lah kitorang chatting, discuss. Rasa macam rapat sume ahliahli dalam tu. Malam malam mmg teramatlah gempak dengan scandal yang pelbagai. Benda yang kecik pon jadi besa. HAHA. Entah kenapa, setiap kali aku chat ngan korang, aku rasa lega sangat. Happy sangat. Even baru kenal, tapi rasa macam dah kenal lame. haha :) Walaupun ado duo ore tu kei, eh meta, tigo ore tu kei, *tmasuk joseph* ado mapuh oyk blog ni jiwo pahtu siap maen copy and paste segala g post kat ramairamai and oyak older post jiwo and macemace, yang even buat aku raso mace, oh mai god malu nyo. omg raso mace nak delete blog, but still, being with them is very fun. Again, thanks guys, for always cheering me up. Thumbs up la korang. Seriously, tak menyesal lansung lansung pergi english camp hari tuh :)

pi esss : weh, kau tak rase aku skema ke tulis ayat pnjangpanjang gtu, then macam nak tulis esei nak hantar kt papaya. HAHA. nevermind, who cares ?

‎"Tetapi boleh jadi kamu tidak menyenangi sesuatu, padahal itu baik bagimu, dan boleh jadi kamu menyukai sesuatu, padahal itu tidak baik bagimu. Allah mengetahui, sedang kamu tidak mengetahui."
surah Al-Baqarah, ayat 216 (2:216)

>> ayat ni. Memang one of my favourites. Normally bila aku rase sedih, aku akan cari ayat ni dan hayati betulbetul. It has a very deep meaning right? Tapi entah kenapa, lepas aku kecewa sgt dengan result tu, aku terus putus asa and keep putting the blame on myself, till suddenly, aku jumpa ayat ni kat someone's blog. At first aku baca, ak nangis, aku sedar aku bodoh, mengkufuri nikmatNya. And starting from that, alhamdulillah, aku dah boleh start terima qada dan qadar ni slowly. Frankly, ak still tak boleh fully terima semua ni, but slowly, I think I will. Thank you Allah. There's no god besides YOU, Ya Karim. <<

♥

i'm not promising, but i'll try .

2011-03-24T10:34:00.000-07:00

if the word for yesterday is MAAF, then the word for today is, I'LL TRY . yes, I will. With all of my greatest effort , I'll try to forget everything. I'll try to accept the fact that ALLAH is planning a better plan for me. I'll try to believe in that. Giving it a second thought, I think what Shiro has said to me before is true. Maybe Allah is giving me a chance. A chance to further my study in engineering. Just imagine that if I get A for my Biology paper, for sure I'm taking medic after this. But seriously, after mama and abah looked at my result, they think I should keep going on with the engineering course. Maybe that's hikmah. Okay, see? I'm trying to be positive right? Yeah c1o ! Keep going on ! U ARE A STRONG GIRL !!

But still, no matter how much I confide myself to be positive and move on, seems like I cant. Whenever I think that how i've destroyed my parents' dream, I'll become fragile, again . Thinking that how would my family felt bout my result, i'm not okay, again. whenever i caught a glimpse at my SPM result, i'll ask myself, 'WHAT HAVE U DONE C1O? HOW COULD U GET SUCH A BAD RESULT? WHY ARE U SO STUPID ? ' , again. Okay now, I'M A FRAGILE GIRL back. Seems like I still cant accept the fact. but i'll try to. Maybe this is just a matter of time :(

I'm really hoping that I can be strong. Not strong like Malik Noor, or as strong as BigShow, I just need a strong heart. YES, like a damn strong and pain-resistant heart, not a fragile one like I have right now. How I wish I can be like others, just accepting the result just the way they are, and not being as down as me. How I wish I am . . . Sorry. I still cant be that redho, but I'll try.

p/s: just now I spent time with my girlfriends at mai's home. Thanks aman, shiro, mai, pia, miera. Thanks for making me laugh and forgot bout the damn result even just for a moment. And just now, my tok ayah, ayah su , pak muda and the family came to 'celebrate' me. I was just like errrr.. CELEBRATING MY RESULT? i told them billion times that I got such an awful result, I just got 9A 1B with 1C , but still, they said it is good enough and of course, they came to celebrate that and I was kinda of touched. Thank you all. At least I know all of my hardworks for the SPM is appreciated. Terharu~~

I'll try to be my oldself back. I promise u that. Sleepy? Who asked u to read this crap? who cares? xoxo ♥

crying wont just be enough for this .

2011-03-23T11:59:00.000-07:00

maaf . that's the only word that I can say now. maaf mama. maaf abah. I'm not able to make both of you proud of me. maaf cikgu. because I'm not able to be an outstanding student as others are. maaf to all of my family. I'm not able to make you say, 'we're so proud of you. we love you angah' . maaf friends. I'm not able to make you proudly admit that i'm your friend. maaf to myself. because I'm not able to make the people around me happy. I'm sorry. that's the only words that lingers on my mind right now. I just dont know why. why I cant accept this fate.

Tak kiralah berapa ramai pon orang yang cakap, 'alaa. okay doh tu 9A' but still, aku rasa katakata tu just untuk kan legakan hati aku. Biar pun mama dan abah just smiled and said, 'Takpo doh tu. Nok wat gano doh. Takut rezeki angah alah ko laen' but still, aku tak boleh terima benda ni. Everytime I think bout that result, seriously, I cant stop crying. even time makan pon aku xboleh stop. *oke tkdi malu meta ore kt kfc tgok ak nangis smbil mkn -.-* .
AKU TAK BOLEH TERIMA BNDA NI KORANG PAHAM TAK? ADA ORANG PAHAM TAK PRASAAN AKU NI? please, stop saying that getting 9As in SPM is just good enough. for me it's not.

maafkan aku Ya Allah. aku tahu, aku sedang melanggar rukun iman ke6 Mu. BERIMAN DENGAN QADA DAN QADAR. aku tahu aku sepatutnya accept the fact yang aku HANYA dapat 9A . aku tak sehebat orang laen. ak tahu ya allah. tapi entah kenapa, hati aku tak boleh terima semua ni. bisikan syaitan mungkin . ya allah, teguhkan hati aku. sebab aku tahu aku tak kuat :'(

abah, maafkan angah sbb tak dapat A bio. ore tahu, abah nak sangat ore jadi doctor kan? mama, maafkan ore sbb tak boleh wat mama jadi bangga ngan ore. even though u keep saying you're happy with my result, but i know, deep inside, i've destroyed both of mama and abah's dream. I'M SORRY . TRULY SORRY. i'm not able to be a good daughter.

i'm expecting to get 10A (i'm not targeting A for Bahasa Arab Tinggi of course) , but in the end, i just get 9A. hehh.. sucks on u FATIN NABILAH ! most of my friends keep saying, mesti ado hikmah disebalik semua ni. aku tahu. mungkin Allah dah tetapkan apa yang terbaik untuk aku. Aku kena redha. Yes, aku akan redha bila tiba masanya nnti. I hope when I wake up the next morning, this frustrated feeling will disappear. even though I know this feeling wont :(

And I hope when I have to get through this annoying feeling, there's somebody on my side, hearing what I'm saying, crying with me, makes me feel better and say, 'believe me, everything will be better soon'. and says (s)he'll be with me forever through thick and thin . i think that way, I will be able to get through this pain with more ease. Crying alone like this all day is quite torturing you know, with nobody by our side ;'(

Ya Allah Ya Rabbi. Make me stronger. I cant stand being like this anymore. I need my old self back : ( ♥

urghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. someone please take me to somewhere far far away from here. somewhere i'll be alone and be able to let out this annoying feeling ! :'''''''''''(

I WANNA SHOUT OUT LOUD ! can i?

the reason is YOU.

2011-02-22T07:56:00.000-08:00

Okay. Dah lama tak update. As usual, kemalasan melanda lagih. Got nothing to say. Silly me. Haha. Gotta go, I got a date with Princess Hour. Saya tahu, tu cerita lamakan. Tapi sebab bosann yang teramat, saya repeat balik segala cerita yang ada dalam lappy ni. That's all. Byebye.

p/s : Encik KBS, boleh tak kalau DREAM HIGH main harihari? Letih la nak tunggu next week. Best oh DREAM HIGH. Damn, Taecyeon and Wooyoung are just the way of toooooo cool ! I LOVE THEM ! But I still a fan of Khun okay. HAHA. And maybe some of you here would say, 'Bakpo nok tunggu dale TV nyo? Tengok je la online' . Okay, for your information, I'm just not the type who watch the dramas online. Sebab line slow gila. Macam siput ~~babi~~ !! Benci la guna broadband :(

p/s p/s : heyhey. I don't know if you did realized it or not, but the 'p/s' above is just longer than the main post. HAHA. Nevermind. Who cares right?

dear my only ALLAH, lead me through the right way and please give me and my friends 11A+. amin..

xoxo ♥

What should be done?

2011-02-14T08:20:00.000-08:00

Okay right now my feelings are soo in topsy-turvy. I just don't know how should I felt. Should I call that confusion? OMG. The SPM's result will be out at the end of February? And some said it will be on 24th Feb ! Seriously, ARE YOU KIDDING ME? nooo, I should say, ARE YOU TRYING TO KILL ME? February? Tolonglah KPM. Lambat-lambatkanlah sikit. Taknakkkkkkk! OMG OMG OMG. What should I do? My body is shivering right now. My mind gone blank. My heart feels so uneasy. And my tear gland feels like wanna crying right now. What should I do? Andd.. What if I get a bad result? What if I don't get the result as I am aiming for? What if mama and abah would hurt because of me? Ya ALLAH.. What should I do? Seriously my mind can't decide what should I feel now. Stop with that. Stop stop stop ! Just have faith in ALLAH girl.

Some would say 'Laa result SPM jah kot. Jangan la risau sangat' ARE YOU CRAZY ? This is SPM people. Maybe for some people, the SPM doesn't really determine your future. But for almost of us , it is a BIG YES. SPM does really affect our future. With the result, our next destination will be determined. The course that we're going to take. And where we are going to study. Seriously, saya takut sangat. Takut sangat-sangat. Sebab time SPM dulu saya rasa saya tak dapat jawab dengan baik. I wish I had a genie. The one that will grant my wishes. And the first wish that I would ask is, 'Let me get 11A+ and let me study ****** taking the course *********' Okay right now I just can't say the course blahblablah because I think my dream is just too high.

Okay now let's move on. I heard from Shiro just now that Che yam got an offer to further her study in AUSSIE or NEW ZEALAND later ! OMG it's new zealand people. And seriously, Aussie? Both are the places that I've been longing to go. Cayalah Che Yam. We're so proud of you girl. You are seriously awesome! I miss you. We haven't met for such a long time. And in the same time, I'm so jealous of you lah. Belum keluar result lagi dah dapat offer. Seriously, tabik you lah! Actually we're so close back then as the seven of us were in the same class for three years in a row. We called ourselves, The Seventh Girls. C10. Aman. Pia. Shiro. Miera. Cheyam. Chenab :) Guys, I miss the old us. Bila nak hangout tujuhtujuh nih? Actually, we're together for three years, but after the PMR, cheyam and chenab moved to other schools. Cheyam moved to MRSM and Chenab to SBP. But no worry, Cheyam pergi pon kat Intec dulu. Takde la pegi New Zealand or Aussie terus kan. HAHA. So, still ada chance la nak hangout dengan cheyam after this. Giving it a second thought, I think, untung jugak kan jadi budak MARA. Senang nak dapat offer dan segala. HAHA. But being in SMKA NAIM LILBANAT is just awesome either . Right naimians?

Okay people. I think I'll be out now. My mind's gone cramp. It has lost it's ability to work out anymore. LOL. Actually I want to watch the korean drama 'Oh My Lady' tonight. But after hearing bout the SPM's result and all, tiba-tiba hati jadi tawar. Jadi takut sangat. I'm such a coward don't I? Coward to face the reality. Shame on you girl ! Okay the clock shows 12:23 AM and I think I'll sleep by now. Oh awalkan saya tidur malam ni. Seriously dengan perasaan takut macam ni, all I think I can do is sleep. But I bet I won't fall asleep tonight. Thinking about the result is such a nightmare to me. But esok, I'll ask Abah whether the rumor is true or not. I'll ask him to ask the people from the Kementerian I think. chinggg* Jahat kan saya -.-

Okay night. Sleep well. Just don't worry much bout it Nur Fatin Nabilah!

dear my only ALLAH, lead me through the right way and please give me and my friends 11A+. amin..

xoxo ♥

weirdo.

2011-02-14T08:03:00.000-08:00

Hey peeps. First of all, I think I need to say a BIG THANK YOU for those following this blog. Toche toche. Arigatogozaimas. Kamsahamnida. Gomawa. Lately my follower's numbers keep increasing. Again thanks for following. Erm actually the point I'm writing this post is I just hope that those who are following this blog should leave their blog's link on this blog too so that I'll be able to follow you back. That would be such an honor to me since I always love blogwalking and even I don't know who's the writer, no worry! I'll keep reading them. And maybe, if you do link me in your blog, I'll link you back here. Just mention it if I forget to link you here okay. I really appreciate for those who follow this blog and always comment here. Remember, you're always appreciated here okeng. That's all. Just don't forget to leave your link here peeps ! :)

dear my only ALLAH, lead me through the right way and please give me and my friends 11A+. amin..

xoxo ♥

put a smile on my face.

2011-02-13T07:22:00.000-08:00

This blog is lacking of updates and I'm not going to say sorry like most bloggers do. Like 'sorry for the lack of updates'. I mean, this is my blog, I choose to write or as well leave it blank. HAHA. seriously. I got nothing to update. Okay actually I'm sooo UNINSPIRED ! I think that's the main cause why I didn't update this blog like others do. Whenever I open the dashboard, the ONLY thing I do is just scrolling the blogs that i followed, click on the link and read them. I enjoyed blogreading so much actually. Okayy no point of saying this. Moving on..

Past few days, (okay, for real, it's yesterday) , I went to a carnival bout the education and blahblahblah. I think there's no need to say its name because i'm pretty sure most of you knew it. There, I met many of my friends and we're kinda like of 'aaa lamo tok jupo' - 'imy' - 'OMG c10 jangok la loni' - 'weh lamo tok kelih mg' and blahblahblah. the 'jangok' part was said by nina and ieda and guess what? I'm kinda of embarrassed when they said that because their voice is quite loud actually till the people around there keep staring at me. Okay, fyi, nina is a ex-komander. Just imagine how she said that - her voice is so loud of course. HAHA. Forget bout that. It's not funny anyway. I met some of my old friends, I mean the friends who went to the primary school with me and I glad I met them. OMG how I miss them.

Wait, I'm wondering why I'm writing in English. In FULL English I mean. Woahh I'm quite rajin don't you think so? And if you notice, the punctuations are all obeyed here and I did even put the capital letters on the letter 'I' and the words at the start of the sentence. This is my first time I think. Back then, I was so lazy to press the 'shift' button to make even the word 'I' as capital letter. Hooray ! HAHA. This post getting boring and I think I should stop talking bout the punctuation things and blahblahblah. I'm a geek you know and I love that!

I told ya, nowadays I was so uninspired and because of that, I'm lack of ideas on writing this blog. Seriously, my life now is quite boring and I totally HATE that. Okay actually it's VERY boring and I'm not lying ! Oh God, how I miss the school, the homeworks, and a bunch of friends that went through thick and thin with me. I miss them. Maybe I'm crazy to say this, but I can't wait to enter the university. Wow ! That is something you don't hear in infinity years to come since I don't really like books and homeworks and others. But being at home, with nothing to do is seriously sucks. It's really a pain in the ass. I loathe that. I LOATHE THAT ! seriously, I'm not a girl whom you expect to stay at home all the time and keep doing the boring things everyday. I'm not. I would prefer going out and shopping (or at least, window shopping) and playing and gossiping all the time. HAHA. That sound morely like me.

Okay, seriously. I was so sleepy writing this post and I think of I reread it, I'll fall asleep. So I better not. But wait, there's rumors around saying that the SPM's result will be out around the mid February or the beginning of March. OMG ! Are you kidding me? I'm afraid. Totally afraid till my heart's beating faster and my whole body is shaking now. Okay just don't believe that -.- . I think I gotta stop now and hey I'm pretty sure you're sleepy now after reading this. HAHA. Serves you right.

Till meet again next time. That would be long I think since I don't update this blog much. Gotta go.

zaijian. do svidaniya. afscheid. au revoir. Lebewohl. addios. sayonara. jagbyeol. tatatititutu.

dear my only ALLAH, lead me through the right way and please give me and my friends 11A+. amin..

xoxo ♥

hear me when i say i believe

2011-02-08T09:24:00.000-08:00

okay. dah 2 hari demam. rasa totured sangat. TAKNAK DEMAM ! yang paling tahan, da tak bole telan makanan. setiap kali makan rasa nak muntah je. ohmaigod. i cant stand this any longer :( and mulut slalu rasa pahit smacam. haihhh T.T . stiap 20minit selalu kena makan daim or tropicana twister orange or milo. kalau tak, sumpah dale mulut rase macam makan sabun spuluh tongkol mentah mentah sebab rasa pahit sangat. hadoii. serious eh. and almost semua keluarga saya demam. starting from kak lang, saya, abah, mama and even kak long yang jauh di perantauan *oke DUNGUN je actually* pon demam.hadoi. kawan kawan saya pon ramai jugak yang demam. aiseh cepat la sembuh. cepat la cepat la. and for those who're on fever right now, semoga cepat sembuh okenggg :) live your life well .

dear my only ALLAH, lead me through the right way and please give me and my friends 11A+. amin..

xoxo ♥

i changed my mind.

2011-02-06T10:05:00.000-08:00

okay. i think i'm going to public this bloggy back. having a private blog is not fun you know. seriously, no fun at all. but for some reasons, i had to make it private. and now, i think it's okay for me to public this blog back. so hey you. who's reading this, WELCOME TO MY BLOG ! haha. my friends keep insisting me to public this blog back. and LOOK ! i've fulfilled my promised okay. so, hannan bt pakcik dani, u gotta fulfill yours too. u HAVE TO tell me who's that guy. haha. u promised me ealier ! :D *got you anan. u owe me a story*. nothing much to say. this afternoon's cambridge's class is so much fun u know. and for the first time, riding bus without kak long or kak na is just good as well. seriously, it's my first time to find the way to the bus station on my own, paying the bus fare on my own and do everything on my own ! fortunately, there was mai. for the first time, i enjoyed riding bus as there was just a few persons in the bus including us, which if i'm not mistaken, there was six passengers and it was like perghh xpayah berpanas sebab aircond pon oke and we dont have to stand up or whatsoever. plus, the pakcik driver was so kind. haha. okay, seriously rase macam nak selsema. TAKNAK! i think i just should sleep by now or tomorrow i'm going to achummm all the time T.T gudnite peeps.

pii ess : after i did private this blog, some of my followers were gone. haha. i dont even care if i had just a few followers. as long as i can just write and express my writing here :)

and who am I? that's a secret I'll never tell . you know you love me. xoxo ♥

heyaheyaheya.

2011-02-06T09:49:00.000-08:00

i'm still worried about my spm result. if i'm not mistaken the result will be published during march. insane much? i'm afraid. totally afraid. afraid of the failure. afraid of thinking how my future would be. how can i survive my life in future. would it be like what i've imagined before? for the god sake, saya takut sgt. i dont know why, but i keep thinking bout the spm result lately. i bet that's because i'm not even 1% confident of my answer during the exam. shame on me.
nothin much. i'm just getting too lazy to update this mr bloggy frequently. double shame on me. haha. i'm getting strayed away. triple shame on me ! HAHA. for those who's reading this, please hit ALT+f4 now because reading such this pointless blog is such a nuisance actually. oke. i think i should stop for now or i'll go crazier. tatatititutu ~

and who am I? that's a secret I'll never tell . you know you love me. xoxo ♥

when i hope the things will get better.

2011-02-06T09:47:00.000-08:00

okay this time i really dont know what i should i write about. silly me. but hey, if u realised it, almost of the posts below here just have the same date [6.2.2011] . that's because i just published the posts which i did just made them into drafts before this. haha. okay, seriously, no point ! what the hell i'm too bored and the only thing that i feel like doing is blogging. i'm such a pointless girl arent i? -.-
okay now i feel like talking bout the driving class. it was not bad though. everything was just good this far except for the part the teacher sometimes gets angry and blahblahblah. and now, i'm not feeling lonely anymore because hasbie bt pakcik bukhari *tiru hannan bt pakcik dani HAHA* was there. thanks buddy. at least u were there when i'm alone and feel like burning up the driving school HAHA. at least u were there when i was left alone after the other people that promised me to register at that driving school ended up abandoning me there. back to the story, we had so much talk and we were just like potpet potpet non stop and i think almost everyone there was staring at us. but, do i care? never. LOL. even that him just looking weirdly at me. i bet he thought that i was such a GOOD girl, SHY girl who doesnt talk much. haha shame on u, judging me just from the outer look. ohh wait, i think i dont even tell u bout that the not-cool-him to u yet. ermm just a second. should i tell you this? urmm it's okay i think. since he wont read this and i will censor his name HAHA. actually, after almost one week i entered that driving school, i got an SMS from one of the students there . he said his name is f*** and he met me at the driving school and he saw me during the undang-undang test and blablabla. he wrote quite a long text and guess what? he confessed to me bout this and that. h e l l o? u were just even met me for several times and we've never talked before. how could u confess bout that? oh my. that's too obvious boy. u were obviously seemed so desperate and not cool and not serious in any relationship. even being friend with you will make me so loya. haha. so, i took the decision not to reply that sms. i wasnt the kind that reply any sms from the strangers actually. then he called me. if i'm not mistaken, he called me for about 7-8 times. that time, my heart shouted, euww NOT COOL at all. when i didnt pick up the calls at all, then he kept SMS me. seriously boy, why dont u get it? at last, he texted me calling me a jerk, arrogant, this and that girl. haha funny much right? when i was reading his sms, i was just like ROLLING ON THE FLOOR LAUGHING ! haha there's a word i should describe u : pathetic . u did SMS-ed me first and end up calling me that and that. that's people. do change in a blink of eyes. after that, whenever i met him, i can feel like he's killing me with his glare. seriously. jeling balik sapa. haha again NOT COOL !!!! okay stop with that guy. seriously, i felt like wasting time talking bout this not important objects called BOYS. haha.

pi ess : u must be wondering why did i keep saying NOT COOL. i bet u'll never get it. just my friends know it. they are well informed that i always like a cool guy. seriously, a hot guy is just not enough for me. cool is better :)

and who am I? that's a secret I'll never tell . you know you love me. xoxo ♥

i'm still, a human. an imperfect human.

2011-02-06T08:53:00.000-08:00

assalamualaikum peeps. first thing to say is, I think i need to improve my english. so, starting now, i will start to use english in this blog. seriously, my english has getting worser lately. okay, i admit, before that, my english is not so good still. i joined the phonetics and conversation class at the cambridge. and i think, my effort shouldnt just stop there. i just think that i have to make more effort to improve. so, i think, writing blog in english is not that bad. so, i'll try. buddies, if u detect any mistakes on my writing, please let me know. insyaALLAH i'll be open-minded bout that and try to improve more. that's the best way i think. but still, i am a MELAYU SEJATI. i'll still writing in bahasa melayu as well. just get it as an exception okay. nothing much. i know that my posts before got so much mistakes (later posts would be the same i bet HAHA), whether the grammar or whatsoever. i'm still a learner dont u think so? and sometimes when i get too excited and ralit writing a post, i usually just forget and dont even care bout the grammar and everything (that what's happen in my exam T.T ). at least i dare to post and write in english rather than those u who dont dare to and just keep critic-ing others right?

dear my only ALLAH, lead me through the right way and please give me 11A+

xoxo ♥

the felling of afraid that still conquering me.

2011-02-06T07:49:00.000-08:00

i did so much blogwalking recently. you know, many of my friends got their own blog now. i'm totally happy with that. at least when i'm boring, i can do some blogwalking to their blogs. okay, no point actually. even i don't know why i'm writing this post. sucks on u fatin nabilah. actually i'm much inspired when i read those blogs which written by the Malaysian students who're pursuing their studies abroad. omaigod jeles gile T.T u know, some of them are in university of warwick, university of birmingham, imperial college london, university of york, mansoura university, university of brighton, university of dublin . wurgh pergghh gile kan? oke stop mentioning bout the furthering the study and blablabla bcoz that will just keep noticing me about the spm result. aiyoo i'm scared. totally scared. what if i get no A? what if i dont get what am i aiming for? OMG i cant imagine that. how can i confront everyone? mama.abah.my siblings.my family.my friends.my teachers.everyone. and the most important, how can i confront myself? ooemgee ooemmgee. I JUST CANT TOTALLY IMAGINE THAT ! i can do nothing by now.i just need to tawakkal and have faith in ALLAH that He will gives what's the best for me.

Ya ALLAH bantulah hambaMu ini. Sesungguhnya aku takut. aku takut aku tak mampu membahagiakan orang-orang disekeliling aku. mama abah and the whole family put too much expectation on me. i'm just afraid that i cannot make them smile when they heard bout my result. aku takut Ya ALLAH. aku takut dan tidak boleh membayangkan bagaimana hancurnya hati mama kalau result aku down. dan masih, aku takut Ya Rabbi. aku takut sekiranya nanti aku mungkiri janji padaMU bahawa aku nak bahagiakan keluarga aku. aku takut YA RAHMAN ! aku takut sekiranya aku tidak dapat menjadi contoh yang baik pada adik-adik dan sepupu-sepupu ku. ya allah, agaknya bagaimanakah perasaan kak long andai aku memungkiri janjiku padanya yang aku akan membahagiakan mama n abah? aku takut. takut sekiranya angan-angan mama dan abah untuk menjadikan aku seorang doctor berkecai. aku takutt... aku takut andai dosaku terhadap mama dan abah menggunung sekiranya aku tidak bisa membahagiakan mereka. sungguh aku takutt... bantulah aku. bantulah kami, SPM leavers batch 2010. bantulah kami semua YA RAHIM. tiada lain yang kami harap selain Mu Ya ALLAH. aku akui aku insan yang tak sempurna. yang lemah. yang slalu buat dosa. yang slalu mengingkari perintahMu ya ALLAH. tolonglah kami ya ALLAH. berikan kami kesudahan yang baik di atas semua usaha kami. amin..

pi es : sory. i'm being so emo out of the blue. i just cant keep this feeling to myself anymore. i'm too afraid to fail. to afraid to broke everybody's heart T.T

current mood : tawakkalutualaALLAH + takotyangteramat :( ♥

when the emotions get twisted.

2011-01-26T09:37:00.000-08:00

sebelum ni, punye la spirit gile nak start blaja drive. seriously. macam excited gile.

but after that, bru la aku rase. ohh taknak pegi KOTARAYA lagi boleh tak? for the god sake, i'm alone there. it was kinda like of OHH WHAT THEE HELLL ! seriously boring gila. aaaaaa tolonglah. aku nak stop blaja kt kotaraya and nak buat kat yakin pandu boleh tak? at least kt yakin pandu, a bunch of my friends is there. actually i love driving. very much. but i hate the part kena blaja kat situ. dah la hari tu kena marah. ohh please saya budak baru belaja oke. dah la kete manual. kalau auto takpe la. stop. cikgu, jangan marah saya lagi boleh tak esok? tolonglah. macam nak mati. esok taknak pegi boleh? T.T aaaa tolong. terseksa amat sekarang !

p/s: believe it or not, i'm the new OFFICIAL driver to my family now. haha. alhamdulillah stakat ni tak accident lagi oke. haha

and who am I? that's a secret I'll never tell . you know you love me. xoxo ♥

nothing's on my mind.

2011-01-19T01:13:00.000-08:00

hey ya. ape nak cakap eh? hadoh siryesly. xtahu nak cakap ape. nak cakap ni je la.

trima kasih AXN sbb sentisa menemani hari-hari saya yang sunyi kt rumah ♥ haha. nevermind.

and who am I? that's a secret I'll never tell . you know you love me. xoxo ♥

it's up to me.

2011-01-19T01:08:00.000-08:00

hey. sorry sgt sbb buat blog ni private oke. nvermind.

♥ feelings that come back, are feelings that never went away.
betul ke huh? that feeling starts to come back to me. i was just thinking, is that right that the feeling did never faded and went away? omg. i hope it's a BIG NO. tolonglah. please go away. please fade away. i'm begging u my silly heart!

and who am I? that's a secret I'll never tell . you know you love me. xoxo ♥

what do you think?

2010-12-22T10:55:00.000-08:00

OMG! i've just updated this bloggie for almost 7 minutes ago and now, i'm creating a new post again. hagaga. i told ya, blogging is quite addictive doesnt it? who cares? haha. actually, i just got something to tell ya here. tomorrow i'm going to KUALA LUMPUR. insyaallah kalau xde hlangan ape-ape. yeah, yippee! yg pnting bole shopping! wohoo. gile kan saya? dapat pegi KL pon da hepy? yea, mmg hepy pon. sbb ni first time saya jejak kaki luar dari kelantan for THIS YEAR since abe chik and I sat for the PMR and SPM respectively this year. that's why time phujung tahun ni la baru bole pegi jalan jalan slain dari pegi besut lately! haha. buibye bloggie for several days. and i think that i'm not going to bring along you along wahai mr.lappy. berat la nak pikul . sakit bahu oke. haha. abah and the boys are going to watch the football match between malaysia and indonesia later. harap aku pon bole ikut. haha. ntah abah bagi permission ke tak. urh, nvm. nothing much, who cares? haha xoxo

and who am I? that's a secret I'll never tell . you know you love me. xoxo ♥

this is what i thought andd, no offense.

2010-12-22T10:41:00.000-08:00

heyy. sory lame x update. jnji kosong smata-mata ckap nk update. haha. lemme tell you something bout today. citt, banyak gilak kot yang jadi hari ni. haiyohh. no need to tell okay? yang tu akan jadi secret jep. haha. i've promised to myself that I'll never be soo emo anymore.* am i able to fulfill it?* haha. actually, aku tanak event yang lepas tjadi lagi. ade org bace blog aku and spread the rumors. kalau la rumor tu betul tu takpe la kan. nothing much to be worried about. tapi ni tak, rumor yg entah ape-ape. gilak ape? dah la smpai mama pon tahu. dia ni la boyfriend aku kononnya, yang tu la. ape kes? please okee, SAYA TAK PERNAH ADE BOYFiEE OKE. sumpah tak tipu! rmai kawan-kawan yg tnye aku psal bnda ni. buat ape aku nk tipu kan? grrh, it's just not my thingy. bout love? sorry! buat aku menyampah je oke. oke, dulu pernah la jugak datang feeling tu, but now, it is ZERO! totally ZERO! sbb lelaki tak pernah berubah. almost of them same je. so, stop saying that i am arrogant. cuma saya kurang suka kalau ade org tego personally. i mean, through the chatbox or something.except la kalau org tu aku da knal. then nak flirt around. then nak tahu lagi? lelaki ni kebanyakan suko maen angin ore pue katonyo ore klate. from a side, nampak baik ngan kite. but from the other side baek jugak ngan other girls. i had once talked about it with my friends. sah! tbukti mmg almost lelaki mcm tu. as an example, ada la sorang ni. nampak oke la, not bad. agak juruh, and nampak tak layan pompuan. then, kawan-kawan yg rpat dgn die told me everything about him and tgok-tengok pnuh pompuan skeliling pggang. yang penting, dia da ade girlfriend oke! ape kes? pathetic sgt ke lelaki sampai tak boleh setia dgn satu pompuan? hahah. tu baru satu contoh. da berlambak-lambak lagi contoh-contoh lelaki yg pernah saya jumpa yang lebih kurang mcm ni. in a conclusion, I HATE GUYS. oke, bunyi mcm tak baek la pulak kan. haha. i'll change it, I DISLIKE GUYS. sounds better? haha. nvm. forget about it. sure korang yg ade boyfriend akan kate, "eh2, boyfie aku bukan mcm tu. dia baik. and bla bla bla" tpulang oke.ni cuma pandangan personal aku. aku totally oke kalau kawan ngan laki. yeah, diorang sporting and somewhat. but when it comes to the love talk, SORRY! you're out of my league!

oke, terlebih suda. this is my first time sharing my opinion bout boys here. haha. kepada yg terasa, opss! i've got nothing to say. sape makan cili dia rase pedas kan kan kan? haha. tapi, yea, kita mane boleh tolak fitrah allah kan? ntah la. aku pon tak nafikan benda tu. tapii yea, tu la pndgan aku buat insan yg bgelar lelaki stakat ini and i think nothing's going to change that. and you know, that's why aku nak jadi engineer, an aeronautic engineer sbb aku nak jadi sebaris ngan lelaki. haha. rase hebat gituh. that's why kbanyakan career yg ak prefer adalah yang agak masculine. aku pon xtahu knapa aku mnat carreer yang tough. maybe sbb jiwa aku lbih tdorong kepada bnda-benda tersebut altough MOST of you saw me as an so called girlish girl. haha. amani often calls me that. GIRLISH. yea, i'm quite traditionally-dressed. aku minat pakai baju kurunga nd sgala. tapi x la kerap sgt pakai. haha. then, aku pkai shawl and somewhat. aku suka pkai wedges, blouse, skirt. haha but that doesn't mean that i'm soooooo girlish right? don't judge a book by it's cover oke? sbb tu kalau ada orang cakap somewhat aku nih girlish, aku mcm errr yeke? and rase a lil bit menyampah kalau org ckap ak girlish. weird much?haha tu sume xpnting, yang penting ; AKU JE YG KNAL SIAPA DIRI AKU :) that's why when mama told me: " k.ngah kno blaja sunggoh deh. biya buleh jadi doc" jap, bukan stakat mama yg ckap cmtu but almost everyone in my big family said that including abah, my uncle, cousins and all , i was like : " errr. tanak tanak tanak!" to me, being a doc is no fun and kinda boring. plus plus, to me, it's quite girlish for me and it's also not so advanced. *oke, agak advnced actually, but i would prefer a job that needs me to move around and not just stay in a place, i love travelling around* . so, aeronautic engineer is the best i bet. haha.

errr, okay. this is quite a confession or something i think. haha. nvm. i just wrote what did my mind think. so it's not a fault right? haha. gilak kau c10. express emotion kat public! and aagain, anda terasa? sile bisik kat tlinga anda sdiri: tak tak aku bukan mcm ni. haha. or did u had a different thought? that's up to you baby. different people different thought rite? haha. sorry yea kpada readers. it's quite confusing to read this post. haha. yea that's my aim, taknak bagi org tahu what the hell is really in my mind and plus plus, i'm not really an expert in expressing something. who cares?

and who am I? that's a secret I'll never tell . you know you love me. xoxo ♥

guess what baby?

2010-12-17T12:38:00.000-08:00

incik bloggie TERCINTAAA! lama tak jumpa kan? so, hai ! okay, aku dah habis SPM ! hoorayyyyyyyy~ yahoooooo~ haha. that's mean aku dah bukan budak skola lagi kan? kan? kan? ow yeah! AKU DAH MATURED. weeee~ xD . okay actually bnyak lagi aku nak express kat sini. tapi aku punya jam tak bagi. dia cakap suh tido skrang. dushhh. taknak tido! nak jadik burung antu mcm zaman muda-muda dulu! *eceeeh* haha. ni pun baru 4:22 AM. still early right? but what to do? esok aku kena teman k.long pegi laen. haduii, sure kena bangun awal esok. tanak tanak tanak ! da la ujan sedang mencurah-curah nih. sure nyeyaaaaaaaaaak gila aku tido. haha. oh ujan? saya suka! ujan best. haha. oke, da stat meracau dah kau ni. pegi ttido ! *oke boss* :)
insyaallah KALAU aku rajin esok, aku update lagi oke? still banyak benda nak tulis. haha.

p/s: hati meronta-ronta nak pegi trip ngan kengkawan. but i had an event that prevent me from having the fun with my friend. aku betul-betul nak pegi. sure best gile kan? urghhh! but, what to do? sometime we need to put the akal before the hati right? yeah, akal aku kata: blood is thicker than water and i think i had made the best choice altough i'm quite regreting for not going the trip with my buddies.yea, family matter lagi penting kan dari having fun ngan kawan-kawan. *ye, saya dah dewasa, so saya plih untuk tidak mengutamakan diri oke. oww yeah* haha fatin nabilah kau meraban apa ni. kalau abah tahu pukul 4:35AM ni kau tak tido, sure abah ngepek potpet potpet. haha nyte yaww !

and who am I? that's a secret I'll never tell . you know you love me. xoxo ♥

sumpah. saya takut !

2010-11-10T09:41:00.000-08:00

oke peeps. SPM tinggal 12 hari lagi. berdebar? for sure lah! sape yg kate : "eleh, ak xbdebar lansong pon. rilek je" sumpah die xde hati dan jiwa. haha. nothing much to say ! cume nak wish GUDLUCK for those spm candidates 2010 especially my great friends. sorry yaww kalau aku ado tersilap dan terkasar ngan korang. sama ada sengaja ataupun tak. haishhh, xnak laa online lame2. buku teks sejarah dah start memanggil-manggil. *erk?bhantu kott?* haha. siryes, sejarah x habes cover lagi. da la aku ni bukan pon oke sgt kalau sbjek2 yg forget-me-not neh. haiyoo. bio xhau la camne. takoooooot. oke, takot saje xjadi kan? kena la usaha jugak, rite? haha. chow then !

p/s: apsal rase pelik je aku tulis post nih? haha. and ni last post bfore SPM. i promise u that !

btw, thnks lagu THE CLIMB MILEY CYRUS sbb slalu jadi peransang :)

I can almost see it

That dream I am dreaming

But there's a voice inside my head saying
"You'll never reach it"

Every step I'm taking
Every move I make feels
Lost with no direction
My faith is shaking

But I gotta keep trying
Gotta keep my head held high

11A+ SPM !

single is the bestt yawww

2010-10-01T08:32:00.000-07:00

i got this from FACEBOOK. got it from mama's friend: teacher HASLINA *she's sooo kind * ;)

An English professor wrote the following words
"A woman without her man is nothing"
on the board and asked his students to punctuate it correctly.
All the males in the class wrote:
"A woman, without her man, is nothing." All the females in the class wrote:
"A woman: without her, man is nothing."

punctuation is powerful :) . and love aint that powerful :D

einstein i fell in love and i hope i dont !

2010-10-01T08:13:00.000-07:00

lame tak berbelog di sini kan? saya slalu ~~cmburu~~ bace org laen punyer belog. selalu je update. tapi saya? sebulan skali pon xsmpai. haha. oke, NERDY you. mood SPM *sessi pikir memikir* kan. haha. gilax. SPM's just around the corner. i mean, JUST RIGHT IN THE CORNER. tapi aku? smpat lagi nak update blog. haha. dah la result aku x segempax kau kau atau kau. aku sdar tuh. heh ~
takut laaa ! nak SPM ! urghh, kadang2 rase macam mcm nak bunuh diri sbb nak avoid SPM ! *oke, tipu je* . aku takot sgt. i'm just afraid if i would hurt the feeling of people around me. macam mane kalau aku tak boleh straight As? gah ! even thinking of it made my eyes gone red and watery. nauzubillah. the thing that i could do now is just usaha and tawakal. ya allah, always be by myside please. i'm afraid if i'm getting futher away from you allah. mintak2 tidak !

ARE YOU READY KIDS? I AM CAPTAIN !

okay. and now i will tell ya about my trial's result. insult la ye kalau korang nak insult. i'm 100% sure that u'll say 'BODO MOLEP TUAN PUNYE BLOG NIH' after knowing my trial's result. oke, ni blog saya kan? undeniable isnt it? so kalau xsuke, please press ALT+F4 ye kanak2 sekalian !
guess it. how much did i get for this exam? c'mon ! guess it baby. haha. oke, stop it. curiousity kills the cat. i only get 9A 1B 1D. oke. sile ketawa dengan spenuh jiwa raga anda tuan2 dan puan2.

*brehat sketika bersama kitkat sbb nak bagi chance untok korang gelak2 kt saya oke* -.-

oke fine. da habis gelak? that's mean u've burnt almost 10-40 calories. *this's a fact okey!* . gile punyer teruk aku punye result kan? siap ada D you. cube teka subject ape saya D? teka la ! teka la ! salah, bukan BIO, tapi BAHASA ARAB TINGGI okay ! i told you millions times that i'm really not into that subject okay. ahh, nok tiyok sero. sero po bodo kepa. okay stop ! or i'm going to cry over this thing again. dont cry over spilt milk la babe. urghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh~ bkpo aku xpndai arab? bkpo aku xpndai bio? bkpo aku xpndai dle semo subjects? bkpo? bkpoooooooooooooooo? ;( *mood swing*

and one more thing. aku takot sgt. sbb MAMA puts so much hope on me. she always hopes that i will get 11A. and what if, i cant fulfill that? what would mama, abah and my family would feel? i just can't imagine that. ya allah, gimme strength ;(

oke la guys. i gotta sleep ! esok tusyen. nnti nero dale klas and KENO MAPUH KO CEGU PHYSICS pulok. haiyohh, mnat laa dih dyo mapuh ore? ahahaha. yaww people, tomorrow's tuition and my heart will be tortured again. yeah, i meant it. urgh, boooo! study la wei. oke. nte yaww people !

*off dengan mood berat hati*

i am OKAY :| *emo and dont read it !

2010-09-16T11:03:00.000-07:00

I WILL BE FINE

I WILL BE FINEE

I WILL BE FINE

I WILL BW FINE

I WILL BE FINE

I WILL BE FINE !

NO !!!!!

i AM fine. full stop

yeah, lupekan aku

lupekan aku

lupekan aku.

aku tak kesah dan TAKKAN pernah kesah pon okay !

i get it, u got your own life and so am i.

bo ahhh. malas doh aku caro ! :|

monologue *u'r NOT ADVISED to read this :

baso lembik nih. jange jerik la bongop. bazir air mato jah. listen here NUR FATIN NABILAH ! u are strong and dont care bout anything. just mind your own life. biya lah ore beci or segala! believe me, U ARE A STRONG GIRL okay ! urghhhhhh *bkpo tears gland aku bnyak sgt produce air mato eh? terlebih hormone kot? urghh. doh la marin jerik doh. lembik kakah c10 nih !

ntah ape ape ;(

2010-08-26T09:17:00.000-07:00

okay. okay. da lame yang teramat lama tak update blog. lemme guess, almost a few months kot? slalu je rase nak update. tapi entah. aku takot sgt kalau ade orang yg tau aku punye hidup. *it sounds better if i dont even have any blog right?* HAHA. okay, dah blur. i got nothing in my mind to be expressed about. hadushhh. esok? tuisyen biology. urgh, rase macam mlas nak pegi. wanna know why? tanye dio tuh. dia la the reason why did i feel soo lazy to go to the tuition tomorrow. haiyoohh. guess what? i'm going to sit for BIOLOGY paper for the day after tomorrow. and what the hell am i doing here? nak exam bio yang markah baru ni tak cecah A pon, tp sempat lagih kau online? haooo,. !

and and and i got something to tell ya. it wasnt that important actually. just this :

nak benda alah ni boleh? nak nak nak. somebody plis get me over this. ntah kenapa. aku betul betul minat ngan benda alah nih. nak nak nak. takpe takpe, lepas spm bodek abah suh beli jom ! haha. abah, nak dslr. tolong la anak abah sore nih. i'm sure that abah has no obstacle buying me that benda. tapi mama ? haiyohhh, kena lepas ngan mama dulu. pakai ayat power power. mintak mintak la boleh. pray for me people ;)
ntah laa kenapa aku minat sgt dengan benda nih. kalau time time boring, terus google pasal benda ni. haha. ntah, aku pon tak boleh nak cakap kenapa aku minat dslr. hanya orang yang minat ngan benda alah ni je boleh paham. right people? :D
kalau korang tak paham dengan nikmat kepuasan dslr ni, try it by yourself people. no word can describe the satisfication. gamba jadik lawa sangat. effect dia canteekk babe. muchhhhhh better than the digital camera. believe me !
no matter what, I WANT AND I NEED A DSLR ! boleh tak? boleh tak? boleh la ;(

life wasn't a FAIRYTALE !

2010-07-13T06:55:00.000-07:00

why am i living in this such PESKY world ?
hell out ! i'm sick and tired of my life !
it's annoying. it's UNFAIR . it's everything that i hate.
people around me. i'm sick of them.
do mind your own life okeh?
and you, you, you . can i scream to the world that I HATE U?
may i? can i say it out loud?
urgh, i'm really confused . why did i always hate the people around me?
i mean, not all of them. just few of them.
people, please stop doing the things that make me hate u.

and now, i'm soooo frustrated ! i mean ~~TOO~~ frustrated.
maybe luck is not by side.
that's me.
the girl that always a bad omen T.T
stop it girl ! u gotta be strong.
let's just take the optimistical view.
maybe the rezeki is not for you.
stop it ! stop ! now !
dont cry, cause that will only make you look super duper lembik !!
urghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh !@#$%^&*()
wegbthsdnmksqjwrhbgvehtjnwkfdhrnjgfmdghyswjk4ye3kqjw !
i'm seriously hate myself. that's all. fullstop.
i better stop rather than insulting myself here.
ya allah, i believe that every cloud has a silver lining.
but, why i always do feel that there's nooo that silver lining for me ? :(

p/s: i really want to revise for the coming exam. but, my mood has gone to the hell ! hurgh ! stop cursing now, and do your homework ! ;( ;C D; T.T ;((((((((((((((((((((((

mood swing ! sigh**

2010-06-30T09:31:00.000-07:00

dunno how to start. lol.

yeah, it's been sooooooooo long since i updated this blog.

da berhabuk berdebu blog ni meh? haha.

nothing much to say actually.

yeah, my mood is swinging. like a monkey, what the hell !

for this few short time, i think i've changed.

yea, maybe a lil bit.

i dont know why, why i should feel this way.

ahh c'mon la prasaan, lari jauh2 boley x?

it must be soo good if i dont even have any feeling.

yea, i mean, imma robot !

that would be better then ! so, i wouldnt have to face the reality of life.

sounds like imma coward? yea i am .

imma freak. i'm sucks. i'm bad.

urggggggh ! x boley bla la feeling nih.

i told ya, i'm being my old self back.

fatin nabilah yg lembik, yang jiwa x btol, yang slalu negative-minded !

sighhhhh**

and i told ya above, i think i've changed.

i dunno whether it is ke arah kbaikan or kburukan.

i think i'll start to be cool again lah.

be my old me. yg x ambek pduli bout the environment. yg x pedulik prasaan orang.

that sounds cruel, but yea, that's the best for me now.

it's up to korang la nak piki aku ape, selfish. senget. arrogant. and whatsoever.

the most important thing now is :

I WANNA BE MYSELF BACK. that's all.

dan kau ! yea i know , u admire him right?

c'mon babe, stop denying it. my instinct says that, and i believe in my instinct.

okay, let's just settle it. ko admire die kan?

yeah, amek je la dye weeeiii.

and for your information, i dont have anything to do with him.

and we dont have any special relationship.

puas ati? stop serang2 aku la kalu gituh !

urgh ! amek la die. amek la ! aku xsey pon dio. aku xsey ! i dont need anybody in my life okay? :( mind that !

*gahhhh, confused with my own feeling. i wanna let you go, but i cant !*

and another you ! please tell me the truth. be frank with me. then the problem will end. i'm totally confused now. u want her? just take her then. ~~want me?~~ tell me the truth. stop confusing me. i feel bad. :(((( . and if u just wanna play and make mess with both of us, please, stop it. because i'm going to kick you a*s ! mind that.

p/s: what the hell am i talking about actually?

fatin nabilah ! sila jadi rajin !

2010-06-14T10:52:00.000-07:00

argh ! sumpah nak update blog. tapi, yeah, kmalasan mnjalar diri.

bnyak sgt nak tulis, nak citer.

bout USM, bout this, bout that.

but again, MALAS. haha

esok ? ! umah shiroooooooo !

weeee, galok puah deh?

haha.

p/s: klau rase rjin laen kali, i'll tell you bout that extravaganza seminar :D

*mind that KLAU word. haha*

doi doi ! ~

2010-05-30T07:52:00.000-07:00

grrr * actually ak update doh last night.

and guess what happen? internet connection putus !

eeeeii. smalam pnyer post habis la pnjang. oh ! oh ! saket aty ~

tadi exam CHEMISTRY. paper 2. urm, oke la kot. bleh la jugak jawab. *not all* and unluckily i forgot to revise the SALTS chapter last night. blame it on me as i just couldn't answer the no 5 questions.

dan anda ! anda rase anda cool sangat ke buat mcm tu. ke korang memang condemned ak xnak bagi aku dapat A chemy huhhh? rase anda cool huh? not at all la babe:(

oke, gotta go ! tomorrow is the chemistry paper 1 and 3. pretty cool huh? hopefully for this subject my marks will slightly increase up as i start to lo chemistry now *OMAGOSH?!*

wuuuuuu !~

2010-05-22T04:11:00.000-07:00

psycho girl !
wah . good 2!
tadi, pia texting me.
and she said someone sent us some 'spot' questions.
HAHAHAHA
and know what dude?
agak dtails la.
waaaaaa ^^
ikut lah. yang penting, still kene bace semua.
hoho.
tuisyen mukerjee pahni.
xsey doh g lwat. nnti kno dduk sore.
haha
chow babe !
;DDDDDDDDDDDDD

exam.MODE

2010-05-18T06:22:00.000-07:00

nak tulis pnjang2 boleh? sbb i'm sooo sure that i'm not able update this bloggie more frequently after this. *exam punyer pasal* lol. deeply in exam mode ! haiyahhh, ceguuuu, i'm still not ready at all la for the exam. halololo.

and seriously, i'm getting a lil bit moooore relieved ! at least ! the situation has getting better. THANK GOD .

haiyaaaah, the exam thing is really really pain in the ass. i need to study, study and study ! but the output? ZERO ! satu pon yang aku baco tak masuk. feels like killing someone ! grrrr. saya pon nak straight As like others too okei? =.=

hope that the result will slightly increase up ! mintak2 lah !! i'm not going to destroy mama's hope. amin ! amin ! amin!

one more crucial thing ! nak pegi vacation ngan my family ! my whole big family ! *sbelah mama only* nanti mid year holiday neh. haiyaa, but unfortunately, i have to attend the USM's seminar. is it a seminar or what eh? not sure lah ! it's just something kinda like that. actually, that seminar is optional . and i dumbly decide to join it.

sebab join: aku takut maso habis gitu jah kalu duk rumoh. lol. at least if i attend it, i'll gain some knowledge and experience. HAHA. bialaaa . i've made up my mind and heart that i'm not going to that vacation. it's better to have some experience than having some fun there. ahhh ! bia la. tetapkan iman che 10 !! just go to USM la dear !it's better for u ;)

what else? nothing more. i've to study for biology ! *bia esok exam BAHASA ARAB TINGGI bena* haha. i'm not going to get B- for biology paper anymore. tak nak ! tak nak ! burok result kau weiii ! okei, chow !

p/s: hepy borndei to my beloved sister, kak long, NURUL EZZATI. koho tuo doh k.long. werrp ;p . semoge bhagia ngan yg tersayang ! kah3.

monolog: just cry all the way you want ! but you will never go to that vacation ! ;(

some kata2 dorongan from mama : "bia laa k.ngah xleh gi pon vacation tuh. mano tahu pahni k.ngah buleh gi jauh lagi for study ! "

amin2 ! ya allah, make mama's word a reality. wish that i'll be able to study oversea. AMIN :)

optimistic side of me: just anggap seminar tu mace summer camp jah ;D

yes i am.

2010-05-13T10:53:00.000-07:00

yah ! memang ! aku dah tak sanggup ! ak fragile. aku fragile. aku fragile ! ! ! ! !

maybe korang x kenal aku. sebab tu sgup cakap aku mcm tuh. plis la ! pliss laaaa !

stop it !

should i cry? should i cry? no ! u shouldn't budak lembikkkkkkkkk !

arghghhhh !

psycho kid !

yeah,maybe ak ptot privatekan blog nih. yeah, i think i will. ni je tempat yg aku ade untuk express feeling. seriously. and i'll never luahkan prasaan to an object called human. blog is better la. it's a good listener isn't it?

*beribu ribu kali sigh*

why? why? T.T

2010-05-13T10:22:00.000-07:00

oh ! oh ! internet meraban raban. benci la gune maxis punyer broadband. nakk celcomm balekk boley tak? hadoyaiiiiii. it's been sooo long since i updated this blog right? *who cares actually?* blame it on the broadband.. lambat kaloh siput babi. xD .

and and as expected, this thing happens jugak. oke la . frankly la kan, i'm not the cause okay ! i'm not the 'kepala' who starts this. gosh, let orang tuh know the truth . haiyahh, letih la macam nih. every year kene fitnah. kenapa??! i never ask them to hate you. but naturally they ALREADY dislike you. and me? i'm just okay kot with you. pliss la. i'm not that evil ok? why can't you see? it wasn't me ok ! walau sejahat mana pon aku, i wil NEVER do such that thing okay ! yeah, i admit it. sume cite tu betol except the part yang aku spread sume bende tu. ahh ! aku pon xtahu nak explain macam mana. gosh, what should i do then? it wasn't me and would never be me OKAY . kalau ak explain macam2 pon kat sini, macam la orang tu tgok kan? so, i'll just keep my mouth shut and pray that dia will know the truth jugak finally. pliss la. aku taknak mende nih tgantung gtuh je. ahh ! nak wat gano neh? nok wat ganoh???????????????????????????????????????

T.T ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh ! budak lembik. just bury your head in the sand lah !

grrr *hadoyaiiii

2010-05-10T19:57:00.000-07:00

oh ! oh !

fed up doh.

tenet rumoh x jadi skmo.

grrrrrr *

ni pon luckily boleh update kat skola.

jago la maxis.

sapa mati aku dendam !

kah2 *evil laugh*

chow !

ct ajok g ko-op.

lol

buhbye ~~

yeay ! finally.

2010-04-29T10:02:00.000-07:00

da lame lame lame sangat tak blogging.

reasons? no reason.

and i've changed to MAXIS. from CELCOM.

line agak slow la maxis neh. *aish, gere sero*

it's all because of mama.

since maxis offered a FREE modem.

so, mama asked me to bertukar kepada MAXIS !

yeah, naluri wanita. loves discount and what so ever . lol

know what? my exam is just right in the corner.

and me? tak ready lansong nak exam.

haiyaa ! da la result bru ni down.

urgh, i don't wanna make mama disappointed with me for one more time.

aiyoo !~ what should i do then ?

and i need a physics tuition !

my marks for that subject ; amat low ! *sigh*

and BAHASA ARAB TINGGI ! semestinye low~

x panda la BAT ! ! ! help me someone .

and and to that person, thanks a lot for the advice that day.

that things leave some positive impacts on me.

at least i'll try to work harder in BAT.

haiyah, hell yeah, i'm well informed that,

i'm not as smart as you. lol.

and and awk, LET'S STRUGGLE TOGETHER FOR SPM OKAY?

let's do our best ! :D

what else? nothing more.

chow doh, nok ajok ore men uno eh.

HAHAHA x abih2 .

p/s: k.long's crying besides me. watching hindustan. haiyo, jiwo laa. HAHA . kalu adow shahid kapoor *or famous as nur fatin nabilah's boyfriend* xpo la jugok . HAHAH!

saya dah letih.

2010-04-06T03:45:00.000-07:00

okay. i handled the annual dinner things. and about the baju tuh. huh! ramai x puas hati kann? abis tuh aku buat undian ari tu rmai yang setuju colour tuh ! and and and ketua kelas form 5 U* kate i dont even tell her to do that undian and bla bla bla. da la cakap blakang. kalau nak cakap, cakap depan aku la weiiiii ! aku oyak doh ari tu ko budop klas mg. ak suh sep tuh oyak ko mg psal bendo tuh. then what? maybe that girls yang aku suh pass benda tu kat kau x cakap kot? sorry okei! that's obviously NOT MY FAULT ! at least kalau nak ckp ape2 pon tolong la gtau kat depan2. so, directly aku boleh terangkan kat kau. paham tak? ni tak ! someone told me that the ketua tingkatan duk mecok mecok , bekok bekok and what so ever because i dont even tell her? ~~wtf~~ la weiiii ! urghhhh. and to 5UA. yes, that's my fault. sbab aku x inform korang dulu psal nih. aku ingat this news will spread and you guys akan tahu jugak. it's not that aku x brusaha lansung pon nak jumpe ketua ting korang. ak g tigo kali doh. sokmo cegu ado duk ngaja. then, aku da tak ingt nak g. at least i got the intention right? haiyaa, ~~sory~~ la weiii. it's not that aku pulau klas sep mg sbb kelas account and what so ever okei? *sigh* doh la this class nok colour ni. that class nak colour tuh. nok colour lain lain for every form la. hadoiiii, banyak orang banyak ragam la sep mg. sometimes i feel like korang ni meme agak ngada2 la. hari tu cakap nak that colour. then a week after that nak colour ni pulok. xleh ko sep kito fivers '10 bersatu hati gak skali? would u?

so what should i do then? nak wat mixed colours kot? doh susoh sangat. bukan senang nak puaskan semua orang right?? biarlah x bersatupadu and what so ever pon. doh sep mg hok nok gnie. so, puah hati doh blako????? T.T .. feel like breaking down T.T

whaaatttt theeeee chickennnnn la ! ! ! ! *lapa ayam wes*

update?

2010-04-02T10:54:00.000-07:00

update?

x sempat.

esok p'mude akem n k'ckin kawen.

slamat dapatkn spupu ramai2 untuk saya okei?

HAHAHAHAHAHA.

suh update lagi?

just one word more.

MALAS!

ni pic for this evening, went to my village.

haiyaa, it's been sooo long since i have a walk at the paddy field.

ssoooo many memory there.

i love my village, yes i do!

jap, some of da pics ta edit. again, malas!

so, please dont laugh okei ! sy thu sy x sperfect anda ;l

*yeay! i did rasmikan that room before the pengantin did!*

*caption kt pic: thnks somebody. i like it when somebody says that i'm tall ;)*

*credit for chah my cousin for this pic*

and, nak kenal my fiancee? sorry, x sempat nak tangkap gamba dia. ni gamba ptunangan kitorang. nme dia kt dalam pic ;)

*tunang saya: sijil pelajaran malaysia! kenalkan*

*ecece, inai siap. plus ring*

p/s: dont tell my parents okay that i've engaged to spm. lol.

putus fius la kau.

chow!

yang terlewatkan ;l

2010-03-29T11:34:00.000-07:00

what if you're in this situation?

you consider someone as your bestfriend, i mean, you love s(h)e soooooo much *as a friend laa* .
but at the same time, s(h)e doesnt even consider you as that? to him/her, you're just a bunch of common friends like others. or maybe s(h)e hates you, but you dont even knew it.

so what would u felt? tell me please? what would the person that was in the shoe would felt? i'm really confused.

p/s: it's about someone. s(h)e asks me about this. so, what should i answer then? i would felt so 'tak bernilai'? nooo, what if s(h)e killed himself/herself after that? lol.

what a chaotic post. see, i start to write mengarut post. haiyahhhhh. actually i got nothing in my mind. my mind is just about that, that and that. and what's 'that' about? dunno lol. i told u. i think i'll start to be crazy laaah! omg.

heyy you. i'm not a perfect person okay?

2010-03-25T12:15:00.000-07:00

hey guys, sorry. i mean, tons of sorry if i'm not a good friend for you. i tried my best to be that good. but, you know me. i'm a freak right? i'm a jerk? i realized that. maybe i'm not a perfect person, but i tried my best to be that best friend. ever. it's okay if you don't want to consider me as your bestfriend or besties. i'm just okay with it. just keep a thing in your mind. if you ever had any problems, or any disaster, insyaALLAH i'll always be by your side, as long as i can breathe. as long as god still lending me this worthy life. i swear. and if i ever had drive you up a wall, i'm sorry. maybe i dont mean that thing. i never hate you guys except for several whom always get on my nerves. yeah, i know, maybe i'm not good in any relationship. i'm not good in communicating either. and if i'm the worst friend that you ever had, tell me then. i'll never get off your back anymore.

p/s: maybe i should call myself a ~~coward~~ for just posting it here. sorry, i'm afraid to lost a friend like you.

2x p/s: mato kelip2 ngantuk nop tidow!

i closed my eyes, and your faces lingered in my mind.

2010-03-25T11:39:00.000-07:00

wait a sec ! before i catch some z's, suddenly, i keep missing all of my dearest friends. ntah ! tak tahu kenapa. and the 7th girls, i miss them. che yam, chenab, i havent meet them for donkey's years. seriously. and memang lately aku jadi rindu sangat. kebetulan, i found this picture which is stored in my pendrive. luckily, sebab lappy baru kena format. cukup 7 orang. aaaaa ! i really hooked up with this pic! gamba ni da berminggu-minggu jadi desktop. miss gile kenangan lame ! UA's generation. budak budak tak matured lagih! why did i become this weak when it comes to a relationship? it's just something like friendship. it's great ! T.T gosh, how i miss the old us ;(

*amani jadi chinese ngan che nab. others maintain. and aku? muke x matured right? i love this thing! izla safinas. nothing can break us apart dears. altough kita da tak macam dlu, but i'll always bear the moments of us together in my mind.*

sampingan:

*gamba last year. budak budak nakal 4 us a.k.a UNITED SOULS. luv all of ya!*

*yang nih, this year. 5 UNITED SOULS. happy together ;)*

p/s: i've just realized that aku dah nak abis skola. after this, no more uniform. no more disciplinary teachers, no more ~~mudirah~~, no more ~~pkp~~ and no more ~~ustazah hachinah~~ + ~~ustazah karimah~~! if i could i would, i'll turn back the time. nak ulang balik dari form 1 until now. boley tak? memories kat naim la yang terbaekkk! yes, i love SMKA NAIM LILBANAT. i really mean it. *dlu habis tok suko. HAHA* i love naim and will always do. and absolutely, all girls schools are better than mixed schools. HAHAH!

asal suddenly i become such this emo? =.='

xoxo student NAIM

what should i do then?

2010-03-25T10:31:00.000-07:00

urm. urm. urm. i got nothing to say. ~~shit~~. this thing always happen to me. whenever ak mengadap this lappy, i'm going to be outta of my mind! damn. i'm really really blurring. so, what should i write then? my results? nahhh, amat rendah. falling to the ground. to liang lahad kot? i just got less than 10 As. amat bodoh kan? pliss god ! make me a lil bit more rajin boleh tak? ahhhhhhhh, minda betol2 empty ! dunno why. duh ! i'm totally zone out. i can smell a rat! mama da nak bangun kot? maybe i should catch some z's now? yeah, maybe i should. kepala dah mula dizzy, mata da mula nak pejam. really got no idea. maybe i'll update later?

*annoyed by the pkbs1 results. hancossss*

nothim more. xoxo.

saje?

2010-03-18T22:49:00.000-07:00

now the guys are performing jumaat prayer. *i mean the muslims only* . and me? mengadap laptop la. and after this, i gotta attend the tuition class. haiyoyo! ~~amat amat~~ malas. wish i'm not a spm candidate. xD . malas. malas dan malas. can't you get it? saya malas ! HAHAH ! entah body aku secreted hormones ape benda sampai jadi malas sangat sangat nih. kaba diri la che10. nk spm doh. and and and just now. i just realized something. something that i should've realize long time ago. but i'm not going to say it here. or my friends will keep asking me bout that. maybe i should open my private blog back! yes, good idea! tp malas nak caro ko duo2 blog. haiyo, gano neh? whatever ! i should off by now. the tuition is waving. i can see it. HAHAHA .

p/s: yes, maybe it's true. we're not that close anymore, right? i miss the old us :/

nk tulis lagi?

2010-03-16T11:25:00.000-07:00

nah ni dye. kau rase kau hebat? kau rase kau kuat? sebab boleh maenkan perasaan pompuan? rase macho? gah ! sorry ! i just dont think that you're that great! konon2 that girl cried because of you? padahal tengok tengok she's with other boy after that.*i saw it with my own eyes okay!* i dont know whether i should classify you in the ~~fool~~-list or koya syok sendiri-list. maybe you suit both of the phrases. enough with it okay. kalau rase hebat, cube make me or some of bunch of my friends yang susah gile tuh fall for you. kalau boleh, mmg ak salute ar. kalau stakat that girl, i knew her well. too easy dude. HAHAH! *ayat tyme menyampah + ngantuk*

and exam! nnti bukak skolah, boley results. gosh, i hope my results wont be that bad. amin!

p/s: hey! dont even say that i'm anti-boys okei. urgh, a boy told me before that i'm such an anti-boys girl. gile ape? i'm still normal okay? HAHA :p

ta tawu nk cakap ape.

2010-03-16T11:11:00.000-07:00

hey, can i consider that as a tittle? urm, whatever. as long as it has a tittle right? haha. and today, seriously, i got nothing in my super duper blank mind. i really have no idea what to write bout tonight. and maybe i'll just be mengarut kokse like i always did. HAHAH! sila masak dengan perangai saya okei. ;O

and now? what am i going to say? kinda blur la dear. okay, let me talk bout the past tiring extra class. and i were in hostel. saat saat yang amat menggembirakan. with rina, muna, budak budak dorm f5 and so on. *ta larat nk mention sorang sorang. harap maklum* . diorang memang amat syok. and i, without any hesitation, would say that, they're such caring and damn nice friends though. thanks buddies. aku sayang korang ketat ketat sendat sendat okay. and yeah, it would be better kalau the 7th girls pon duk hostel. hurm, though i knew that they won't agree to stay there ;l . and after that, i catch up a cold. then demam. sebab kena hujan and i ~~forgot~~ to bring my umbrella. yeah, really really hope that my immunity wasnt this bad. ~~da kene ujan sket jah trus demam~~. haprak la. amat amat menyusahkan. and 'credits' to that fever, i gotta skip my mathematics and additional mathematics classes and ended up the day with taking some dummy pills and just sleep. what an empty life. and that's officially my second fever for this year. haiya. so lembik la lu! hurgh.

and tadi, pusing pusing kbmall lagi. with my family. and routine biase, pegi beli psp n nds games, bayar broadband, teman mama tgok baju, watson, kfc *sbb abah xde*, and buying3. shopping2. tobat eh tadop kijo. HAHA. oke, nk men uno bersama en.fariz, en.amani dan en.epa sebentar. and after that? ape lagih? zZzZ la! hihi. and yeah! i need an passport pic. i need to submit that form as fast as i could. amin2. mntak2 la boley dapat passport pic sblom abis cuti neh.

p/s: gosh, banyak giler tertinggal buku kat skola. and now, i've got nothing to study. *ade jugak sket2 actually* HAHA. my mind keeps put that as a alasan. hadoyai. oke, off to UNO!

double p/s: oke! UNO buat hal. xboleyh maen. punye la ltih tggu kat lobby. tgok2 rosak. ikot dye la. yang penting, kene tido! kalu mama tau aku xtido ag tyme ni tobat keno ngepek. ya, ya. ape kaitan baru recover dari fever ngan tidow lewat? nothim right? then i should sleep late. *x sabik lasom* HAHAHAHA

cheten

life?

2010-03-11T09:50:00.000-08:00

when we talk bout life. everything's possible bout it. ~~tade modal~~*
and tadi, the spm results were announced. 2 students of smka naim lilbanat got straight A+. wan dhiya sabila and faizan radhiah. woow, otak diorang memang berganda ganda geliga. and when i'm asking the tips untok berjaya kat k'eijank, she just said "eh, ore tak study pon. ore tidow jah kijo" HAHA. amat funny. impossible lah ! tido-tido, kuar result 11A+ . *ko 12A+? not sure*. your brain must be kinda of genius i think. and k'dhiya, she said "keno wat siap kijo skoloh sokmo" HAHA. then i asked her, "nota xsiap xpo kea?" *wat a silly question! tahu la malas wat nota. xD* then she answered "nota xyoh xpo. kijo koloh hok petim" kah3. macam macam la korang. btw, lots of congratulations for both of you. they must be offered by the prestige scholarship i think. wah! oversea! and to all naimian 30 orang yang boley straight A's tuh, congrats jugak. and to semo naimians la seney. eh2, budok skoloh laen pon! hoho. congratulations blako :D

and tomorrow? i'm going to attend the extra class *somewhat of seminar kot?*. and i'll stay at hostel. hadoii, this is what we called as the pengorbanan. okay, since skrang my desire to get straight A+ is soooo high, so i'm just okay with this surely tiring extra class. it starts from 8 am to 11 pm. somewhat of crazy right, but for the sake of spm, i'll just go on with it. and sakni, bajet2 la nak wat puding gula hangus [atau name glamournya puding karamel] ,then tgok2 gas dapur *ko ore pggil gapo* habis. wattt?! da la tyme tuh, all the apparatus and materials da siap *cheh, mce dale lab. HAHA* . then aku still x puas hati. nk bawak jugak puding tu pegi skola. blanje kawan2 especially hostel students yang xsmpat balik umah. they surely miss home damn much. ak pon try dengan somewhat of periuk steamboat tuh! HAHA kire kukus la jugak kan? tp lastly, TAK JADI jugak! aih, hati ini amat saket membara menyinga. then abah kluar and cakap, "gi tdow nuh gih. pukul 12++ doh. lamo kea ngantuk esok". i just said "okey2" then msuk bilik online balik. HAHAHA. kejam kijam kujam la kau.
cukup. harap results for this up1 exam akan naik. amin!~

exam ! exam ! my life's just all bout exam! sigh*

2010-03-06T09:31:00.000-08:00

gosh! nak study! but my mind's totally disturbed! seriously, i don't know why. I've been kelip-kelip in front of the book for almost two hours. but the result? feels like i'm not studying. feels like zero. ~~empty~~ ! ah! i wanna score A+ for my PHYSICS okei! i mean, just A would be good enough for me for this UP1 exam. i really, really count on that since i love this subject now. you know, i hate physics for last year. it's just because of the teacher actually. the one who taught me physics. huh~ but now! i love it. *i mean, quite love it* . ~~nak kate damn love physics pon tak boley since i dont score A in this subject for the final exam !~~ gahh! ikot la. whatever. whatever. and whatever ! full stop.

tak nak exam! tak nak dan tak mahu. sangat sangat. it keeps torturing me. tak nak spm ! boley tak? dah la this week all the subjects would be harsh on me. bahasa arab tinggi, physics, biology, additional mathematics, chemistry. hey, they look somehow 'interesting' right? and they're enough to make me painstakingly study for the sake of A+s. thanks you for all those subjects. and i dun even need any migraine disease to make my head spinning. they're enough to make me cry too i think. HAHA. what a nonsense. u cried because of the exam? *yes i did* . laugh out loud.

yeah, suddenly, i've been thinking bout the past. my life when i'm still a child, i mean an innocence child, my life does'nt get this difficult. and now? my life seems to be duller and twisted. that's why everybody keeps saying that time is the greatest thief. am i right? i think i am ! oke, no more. i need some sleep too okei ! and tomorrow, i'll sit for my bahasa arab tinggi paper. gosh, i keep thinking, who do i want to ~~tiru~~ their answer for this damn paper tomorrow? HAHA. i sound bad right? but hey! i'm not that cruel! i'm just gonna ~~'meniru'~~ just for this paper. while the other papers, other friends keep to copycating me. now, they have to balas jasa and let me know their answers too right? it would be fair then . HAHA, obviously, i'm stretching the truth ;D

cheten

dunt make me change my mind.

2010-02-25T08:48:00.000-08:00

nothim much to say. juz lapa. hungry. and lapa. HAHA. and this monday, ujian pengesanan 1 will be held. OMG! and i'm not ready at all! yes, i mean it. AT ALL. haha. arap result x turun. amin. amin. amin. gosh, i cant blieve it. juz cant cant and cant. dah. cukup. chow.

p/s: esok tsyn! malas. faham x? MALAS! haha. but luckily esok tyrah pegi jugak. hooray. luv ya! yeay, tok sorey doh la esok. haha :D

weh! boring !

2010-02-22T01:08:00.000-08:00

urm. currently? dalam com lab yg skola pnyer. and now sdang bjalannye pjumpaan klab multimedia dan rakaman digital. hadoi. borim gile. ustaz omar ngah bobe gapo hau depe. ak blakang neh? ape lagi? blogging ngan fb-ing la. hahaha. siye ko ustaz. ooo, dyo duk mnuju ko blake lah. ah, biya la. buat bodo je la. duk ngaja publisher ape bnde ntah. mcm la ak interested! hahah! kjam giler. klu aja photoshop ko xpo la jgop. boley edit2 gamba. ha. ha. ha. okei la. mlas doh. chow.

p/s: to naimianz, bukok website ni deh? ni hok sosial networking untok naimianz SAHAJA. ustaz pa wjudkan. hoho. join deh. it's juz sumthing like friendster gtu la. sdak la gop potet duo. haha. ni link

naimian bukok sinie

oke. nothim more. mlas nk update da.

2x p/s : maren frst fever for dis year. huk aloo la. bru ajat xsey deme dis year. haha. n maren frst tyme gop x g skola. haha. sdak3. but a lil bit borim! : l

2010-02-17T11:59:00.000-08:00

hurm. bru jer lpas dlete blog private. tp yg stu ag stil ade. sayang la nk dlete! haha. and the deleted blog.. urm! when i reread it. bru thu, jiwo gop ak dih? hahhaa. bnyk giler luah prasaan dlm tuh! luckily da dlete. fuh, lega!

aa, ta ngantuk la! budak2 ni sume da zZzZz. and me? not sleepy lorh! jap, sjuk la. adjust temperature aircond meta. ketar doh neh. [tekan2 rmote aircond] . hahah! ngek la. bndo gtu pon nk tulih ko? hadoi, doh xdok modal lajop doh. hoho. n tadi, ta pegi pon pstaka azzahra. balek kg je. oOo, sdap wok mkn mskan pak teh amar. dye org sabah. mmg pdas giler, tp sdap! haha. mnjilat ibu jri kaki siap! hoho. nothim la, sje je nih! sial la buhsan.

n tdi, bru amek quiz yg nk tawu rmntic ke x? hahah! ni sume idea epa la. nk check hopeless rmntic ke x. hadoi, epa skang da maken, maken dan teramat maken jiwe karat! haha. and quiz yg kitorang jwb tu mmg rsults for both of us HOPELESS ROMANTIC la. adoiiii, i dun think that i'm that type. tp ntah, stiap kali quiz, rslts dye mcm hmper2 je? romantic, hurgh! sial, yg ko g caye kt quizzes tu pesal? hahah! cume yg last quiz tuh, da x boley hopeless romantic! satu ag marks bru la rslt dye hopeless rmantic! nseb baek. epa, i'm btter than u okei! ak xdop la jiwo po mg! whaha :D . oke. ngantok. mau tidow. nk chow.

jap, nape tibe2 rse rindu kt kpop eyh? mybe sbb da lame xtgok their vids? aiyoyo~ music bank! da lme xtgok ;( . miss KBS WORLD ;(( .nk download pon, kemalasan yg tramat! aku an gune broadband! klu nk download tuh, mmg hopeless la. nk mati tggu smua download tu complete. sape2 baek ati jiwe, tolong download vids SHINEE eyh? vids avril ugak. lappy da kene format. abis ilang sume. wtf lah! urgh! watever lah! gotta chow.

p/s: miss MINHO damn much. da la xsmpat tgok dream team skni. ayoyo. nok tgok! huh, he shines my life every week. so cute! LOL. thnks for shining my life dear :) *ceh, po kecek ngan gewe! haha* oke, i'm out of my right mind now. just ignore me lah! wth la. haha

yeay! berBLOGGING lagi!

2010-02-16T09:05:00.000-08:00

lame gyler rse x update blog. dlam 2 weeks kot? or 1 weeks ++ jer kowt? ntah! da lupe. oke, abaikan. xhau nk tulis mnde. hadoi. otak kering karat ngan idea. now, da cuti skola. tp just for 1week jer la. urgh ! nk cuti lame2. bru boley online puas2. hahaha. tamak gyler ko biul. da boley cuti for 9 days ni pon da kire okei tau x? n homework btimbun. kalau ak boley susun sume omwork yg tramat2 mmbebankn *but benefial* uh, sure da boley wat eiffel tower an? hohoh! mcm2 la. and lately, smngat bkobar-kobar gyler nk pegi oversea. A level. argh! angan2 mat jenin la. nk msuk IPTA pon xsure ag? hahah! but, i'm really2 targetting for 11A+ . *tak! 10A+ je kot? BA mmg xtrget arh. haha* sounds agak impossible kot klau 11A+ untok ak? da la '+'. gile lah. the marks should be 90++ rite? urgh. if untok sveral subjects tu boley kot? but not for chemistry! haha. physics pon? sure!

urm, my up1 just tggal 12 days lagi. *rsenye la?*. sial lah. ak skang ni buku pon mlas nk sntuh ! kmalsan yg tramat nih. tolong ! da la xtra class tyme skola dri ptg smpai mlm. *svral days je*. mmg sial la ltih. giler yg tramat giler ltih. tp agak berbaloi kot? everything happens for a good reasons rite?

n tomorrow, mybe nk pegi pustaka azzahra kowt? first2 bncang ngan kwan2. nk wat stdy group. tgok2, x jd? wtf? hadoii. bia la. juz pegi sensorang kot? tgok ar dluh! klu bgun lwat, mmg sah x g la. hahahaha.

n one more thing! NAK DIET! DIET! DIET! omg. berat badan da naek 2kg. wtf lah. sial. hadoi. skang ni keep makan, makan n mkan. hahaha. bia la gemok pom? as long as ak yg bhagie :)

p/s: wat am i babbling bout? wth la. mate da tpejam2 tnde mau tido. nyte. kalau rse pnjang n post ni kosong n useless pon bia la. ni idup ak. blog ak. ikut ak nk tulis ape oke. da stat mraban. baek chow. haha. bye. n hepy CNY ! !

double p/s: sory klu ade spelling or grammatical errors. da x wat double check. mlas. ngantuk. xde mood. mood da lari balek ke uk. urgh! nk pegi UK! JAPAN. GERMANY. wat so fatt la. nk pegi. doakan sy boley 11A+ spm n boley stdy oversea oke ^^ amin.

2010-02-16T08:27:00.000-08:00

nk sgt update blog. tp sory! da sleepy sgt.. sory peeps! nyte.

p/s: da pkul 4.48 am tp mte still not sleepy! urgh, but i'm damn sure that mama'll wake up for less than 20 mnutes more. or mama'll keep babbling all the day tomorrow.

urgh!. gotta sleep. N Y T E..

separuh jiwaku pergi

2010-01-29T11:23:00.000-08:00

no! dun get me wrong. actually xhau nk tulis post tittle mnde, n tulis jew lah to the song that i'm currently listening. SPARUH JIWAKU PERGI - ANANG. sysly lgu ni besh giler! tramat2 besh. then lagu aizat PERGI. altough all those songs da agak ktggalan, but i'm still hooking with them. haha. urm, wat eva je arh!

let's get to the point. the point why i'm blogging to post bout the freemason, illuminati, and for surely related to the recent AJL. yeah, i'm juz trying to use this blog for the right way. boley dkwah2 others n wat so ever. tp, hurm, agak kmalasan lah! nk tau ugak? nah ni link dye. read it by urself la.

click here! sure x nyesal! bout freemason *AJL*

dunno why, but lately, i'm juz being too lazy to blogging. it's not just blogging, but fb-ing n ym-ing too. ym uh mmg all the tyme la ak wat invisible. just tonite je kot wat invsible. or budok tuh is going to say that i'm smbong! ahahaha. mce2 larh! n this evening, went to mall. sje hav a walk with k.long n k.na. n all my money has just dssapered! buken kne curi or ape, juz shoppin' a lot lah! agagaga. x bnyak pon ecely. i'm looking for a bag, nk wat g tsyn, tp x jmpe lah! adoiiiiii~ n sumbody, plizz get me some money plis. ak da btol2 pokai neh. abah, bagi la lagi duit. plisss. hoho~ n kt kbmol, met mr.aisya, azmir, n amir. *btol kew diorang? not too sure lah! tgok dri jauh jew* . i really thought aisya pon pegi ugak. ye la, kot2 nk wat date or somewhat rite? ahahahahaha.
n tomorrow, gonna be alone again! yes, i mean again! sbb k.long ngan k.na da nk pegi. urgh! x sey doh tdow sore. nk adow k.long ngan k.na etek. ni pon, sbb kitorang bertiga, so share a bed for three. bukan nseb bek xjtuh! ecely, bukan xde bilik laen, pgap borim! ahahaha. for sure, i luv them! so much, xpcially k. long! fyi, k.long is my bloved n ONLY sist. k.na is my cousin. dunno wat to say anymore. everybody cam da tdow jew.tggal ak snsorang jerp. hoho~ nk tdow jugop lah! ngantuk doh.

p/s: da ckp blog ak boring an? haha. saper suh bce, serves u rite!

xoxo cheten

listen to ur heart! not mind!

2010-01-27T10:03:00.000-08:00

the RIGHT way to love someone is, just let the person we love, happy with the person [s]he loves.

seriously. if u'r doing this way, u'll feel more rlieved. we should be happy if the person we love is hepy rite, altough the person [s]he loves is not us. at least ak bahagia bila kamoo bahagia :) awk! take a gud care of dye okei? i mean, great care. okei??

p/s: need to sleep. so, i juz cant update this blog to a longer one. just a simple, short and compact one only. this weekend, going to post yg pnjang2 lah! ahahaha.

2x p/s: the printer's such a wet blanket! tomorrow, gotta submit my homework to PAPA YA! ommigod! printer wat hal! cartridge dye bocor! sialan molep. gilowr lah! urgh! xpo, wat cool jew lah! haha. abis itam tnge keno ink printer hok boco tuh! adoiii~ n esok? pjumpaan parents for spm cndidates! gosh! wish me luck!

xoxo cheten

dont stop me!

2010-01-21T10:33:00.000-08:00

i wanna breaking free

i wanna dissapear

i wanna flee

i wanna feel no more sore

no sorrow, no pain

please, no more!

my soul is tattered and wounded

dont wanna stay in this world

where i'm alone, by myself

dont stop me

i wanna vanish this grief!

p/s: emo kjap! HAHAHAHA. ayat ape ntah, meraban giler. ngarut jer ckp!

2x p/s: really wanna breaking free~~

xoxo cheten

jiwe haprak kosong kacau bilau

2010-01-21T10:08:00.000-08:00

bla..bla..bla.. mood kurang. almost to xde lansong kot! lame siot rse x online and updating. for almost 5 days. *lame ke?* HAHA. t0 me la an, 5 hari x on9 tu mmg sumthing yg boley dbanggakn! xD .hurm, i'm still thinking.. thinking.. and thinking.. nk bukak balek x eh blog private tuh? or should i just continue blogging here? arh! sni mcm too pblic. sumtimes ak jd tkot nk tulis sal thiss and thatt here..~ urm. wanna breaking free~ tp kalu yg private pon agak xbest ugak kan? sbb xde rspons from anybody. but that's btter than others piki ak bukan2 rite? hurm, my mind's still kacau bilau. and diz week xtra clas da stat! ltih gile weh! da la yg klas mlm pon ade. jd tired sgt2, ++ sgala problems yg mnimpa. sumtimes rse burden, smpai x tpikul. god, make my life easier plis. soal study lagi, kwan2, prasaan. urgh! not going to talk much bout it. the most important thing now is: STUDY! SPM! 11A+ *ecely 10A+ coz mmg x trget A+ for BAHASA ARAB TGGI* LOL~ ya allah, jauhknlah sgale prkara yg boleh wat ak leka.. yg wat ak jd burden tuh. jauhkan! jauhkan! amin~
yg pling x besh, this strday ni skolah! gile sialan ape nih! bagi la rest ugak! arghhhhhhh. n akan ade sports day later. um, tkah da msukkan nme ak dlm kawad nusaibah pnyer tuh!! uhhh~ ntah bile ltihan kwad tuh. mntak2 la mama x marah coz i'm still join that activity. and that's mean, akan bmula smulalah zaman kgelapan kulitku. *bia sblom ni da glap pon. HAHA* lpas kwad tuh, for sure la kulit akan berpigmentation. erm, bia la, jd dark pon! yg pnting enjoy~ since kawad's smthing enjoying! and now, cant stop thinking.. nk activ balek x eyh blogging kt private blog tuh? should i? or shouldnt i??

xoxo cheten

fun day!

2010-01-16T07:22:00.000-08:00

hurm, went to that family day today. quite tiring, but so much fun! banyak gile game2 yg dyeorg organised. i just played few of them. actually, klu boley, mmg nk join sume. tp, hurmm, game2 tu majority dye boys and men yg join. nk gile maen PAINT BALL! besh sgt! altough rmai kate saket! ade yg merah2. ade yg jd smpai bruises. adoii~ xkire2, nk men jgak PAINTBALL! sys jeles tgok boys maen td. da la yg teens pnyer ctgory xde gurls pon yg join, sume boys. xkan la ak tibe2, nk msuk girl kt ctuh snsorang! *tp okei jugak klu ak ni muke xhau malu* HAHA. sysly, besh siot tgok dyorang men! boy yg pakai bju ijau tu terror men! mmg team blue boley victory sbb dye. kau ganas la beb! HAHA. da la mse dye msuk nk amek flag kt kubu dyorang punye enemy tuh, sume enemy tuh mcm blurr giler. x tmbak pon dye, juz let him go and take the flag. sialan lah! pdan muke kene mrah ngan coach! HAHA. abah n abe cik join n menang! ho0ray~ and mse scond round tuh, pity that brown trousers, white shirt. kene tmbak kt head. btol2 dkat eyes. luckily pakai yg mcm paintball pnyer helmet uh. klau x sure da blind da ko! HAHAHAHA. sys, fun giler. cuci2 mate. xD . ahahahahahahahahaha. boley hmper untok lucky draw! whuhu~ eyh, asal ko tuh ? ar! srabut2. yeah. now, i'm totally out of my mind. wHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA *laugh style prof. klon!* xD

p/s: gotta sleep early. insyaALLAH nk bgun awl kot. neeed to study chemy! T.T

2x p/s: nk upload picca tp xsmpat. hoho~ nxt time!

3x p/s: post ni boring kan? bia la. klu x sukee boley blah! press ALT + F4 dude!

cheten xoxo

arh!

2010-01-15T10:25:00.000-08:00

td x pegi pon tusyen! hooray~ the reason is sbb abah said 'oloh, nk abih bule bru nk g. g bule 2 slalu la seney. agpon, esok kno g family day kt office abah'. ak pon, ape lagi, yeah! abah's da best! HAHA. mcm paham2 je ak tknak tsyen untok skang. wuhuuu~ actually, td bdget la nk tgok solar eclipse an. then, tgok2, tertidow. agh! memang nk tgok arh. tp an, boley ke solar eclipse klu tgok ngan naked eyes eyh? HAHA. not too sure bout that! and esok kene pegi family day anjuran JPN kelate lah! aiy0o~ actually, i rfused to go there. but abah said la an, abih tu xkan nk leave me alone kt umah? *oke pe. boley lyan industan* . abah takot ak boring and wat so eva lah plak. so, ikot je la.normally klu fmily day, bebudak jew yg rmai. and game2 pon untok budak. untok teens xde kew? HAHA. herm, then ak tpikir, aah la. afaaf's mum pon keje jpn. so mybe dye adew la. hope so. or i'll be alone tomorow! arghhhH! n klu boley, bia la anan pon ade same! bia die x g ostel ke! ag best! HAHA. wat eva lah! yg pnting esok jumpe sape2 yg ak knal, so boley borak2! tp rsenye xjmpe kot? coz most of my fren's parents x keje kt ctu. and sysly, bju xplih pon ag. nk pkai bia nmpak santai je kot. tgok arh esok! for sure xkan pakai kurung la an. gile kalau pegi pntai pkai kurung. ahahaha. nothim more. bout that thing, tknak ckp. bia la rhsie. bia la antara ak, my soul n me je. no screts beyond two rite? and epa, i need ur blog link! gimme pliz!

nk post picca kot? sbb da edit td, tp siket je yg upload msuk fb. tnak la ltak so much pics kt fb *bia dah agak bnyak pon picca yg ade kt fb* xD . and this sunday, satu lagi hari yg busy akan bmula! argh! da xboley on9 ;(

*hoping for this. 11A+*

*nmpak mtured rite? agagaga*

*keje part-tme. snap! edit!*

*ninja*

xde keje laen kan? edit picca je keje. btter g wat addmath ke, physics ke. HAHA

p/s: sy thu sy imperfect. sy x gorgeous mcm korang kan?

xoxo che10

imperfection

2010-01-14T10:32:00.000-08:00

not pretty. not beautiful. not gorgeous. not intelligent. not brilliant. short. fat. dark. not a bright girl. not a genius. and not prudent. not a crucial girl.

conclusion: IMPERFECT!

the characteristics shown above are all bout me. yeah, it's kinda obvious. i'm lacking. too imperfect. not a kind and diligent girl either i think! gah! wish i could be btter. but no one can change u but urself rite? ah, okey. i'll try to change myself. to a btter one. and pacing to a perfect girl. altough i know nobody's perfect. hoping i'm not this sucks! dunno why, but lately, i'm feeling down. feels like i've nobody. sounds silly rite? i should be grateful for hving such a wonderful family n friends. that's why i call myself imperfect. why did i neva appreciate and be grateful for all those wonderful things and great peoples that have been part of my life? when these peoples getting far and far away from me, then i'll realize how stupid i am for not appreciating them. urgh! damn! then i'll start regretting everything. NO!! i dun wanna be that weak. from this moment, 1:49 am , 15JAN2010, i'll be a new NUR FATIN NABILAH. as mntioned, a btter one, not a worse one. insyaALLAH.

for now, i'm not going to think bout boys or any sucks things that will ruin my life and make me dawdled over it. but juz cant overcome my enthusiastic over online-ing, gossip girls, shopping, chocs and so on. haha.mybe i'll dcrease my online time. yeah, i mean it! really2 need to struggle for spm since mama put so much expectation on me! gah! wish i'll do btter for her. luv to see her hepy. HAHA. and abah too.

urgh! shitto! currently, my money flow is not right. i overspent it. now, really dun have any money to shopping! help! i wanna buy a shawl. *bia shawl hrge murah je pon, tp syang nk gune duit tuh* HAHA. hope i hve some money to burn. urgh, if i get $100k in my pocket, i'll spend it all on shopping! HAHA :D

and by tomorrow, i'll start my tuition class at pakar. gah! again, i'm going to tuition centre alone. yeah! ALONE! here i mean that thre's none of my frens there. juz like in Al amin last year. plis god! dun wanna be alone like last year. gimme bunch of good friends there. hope i will =D .

and one rminder to anyone, plis mind ur language when speaking. u know, sometymes u juz dont realize whether u've hurt sumone or not. and boys, plis take notes that girlz are much2 more senstive than u are! notice that! though we're juz friend, but sometimes u need to care not to hurt our feeling too okei? got that? argh! dunno why i'm this snstive tonyte~ and everyone, sory if i've ever hurt all of u. plis forgive me for all of my mistakes, by purposely or not. let me be a btter person.

p/s: *monolog* urgh! can u be a lil bit more optimistic che ten?? stop felling down! would u?

2x p/s: da wat invisible ym, xnak rep mne2 msg dlm inbox *fb* and offlinekan fb chat. good ways to avoid any guys. yeay!

cheten xoxo

smbungan post below. ttinggal!

2010-01-11T08:48:00.000-08:00

HAHAHA. stil got sumthing to say. act, nk continue trus ngan post below, tp mmnadangkn da bderet2 that post, n azam tknak tulis post overdose pnjang da psni, i decide to write kt new post. LOL~ perlu ke ak jlaskn sumer nih? aduh! damn, ape yg ak tgah babbling on midnight like this? wth!
oke, nthing much to say. it's just, i still dun get sleepy, altough it's quite late. i think, blogging's btter than sleep rite? HAHA. this aftrnoon, tyme class chemistry, ak nearly nk kene rotan *ngan ruler je ecely* . coz that tcher akan rotan mne2 studs yg xwat ag graph n gradient tuh. when she came to me, ak trus tadah tgn sbb ingt graph yg ak wat tu salah. the she asked, 'bkpo hlur tnge nyo? buke btol doh? ' HAHA. sbb ak tkot kt kau la ckgu! xD . 70% bebudak 5 UNITED SOUL [US] kene rotan sbb wat gradients salah. and pity anan. i think dye wat da btol gradient tuh. but, mybe the teacher holds some grudge twards her i think. so dye kene caned jugak! x ptot!
then, kul 6, mama jmput kt skola sbb bru abis KO, jalan jam giler! kate mama, nyesal x bwak bread td! HAHA. and i nearly missed my asar prayer. giler! nseb bek smpat! lOl~ actually ade accident on the way on the road tuh. and mse mlalui that accident, i saw agak rmai la pkar2 forensic ngah siasat crime scene tuh.*yeah, forensic bebeh. they inspired me damn much!* dun sure why, xcdent ke ade blaku crime kt ctu eyh? not so sure! ak yg exhausted giler dalam kete tuh, trus mloncat2 dlm car tuh sbb boley tgok polis2 frensic ngah wat siasatan. HAHA. mama mcm da paham2, snyap je. x babbling pon atas overexcited ak tdi! hepy2~ nk jd cam diorang. but, forensic kt mlysia is not so challenging la. mne besh. but, if at UK, london , england or sumwhere, it should be fun. i dun mntion NY or US here as i think it's too dangerous for muslims to go there.takot dkristiankan and wat so eva! if at england, agak rmai la kan mslim, so agak tjamin! *really luv NY ecely*!
aiyaaa, this post seems to be panjang too. gotta stop here. need a good sleep now! btol2 pnat. need to restore my energy or i'll be sleppy in class tomorrow. c'mon! struggle for spm oke babe? lets do it! prove it! let's prove to the world that we'r not that bad, man! go to hell la to anybody yg xpcaye 2010 spm cndidates can do the best! HAHA.

p/s: tfikir. mau join kwad umah sukan ke x eh? aduh, btol2 nk. ni last year da! hope mama bagi join. alaa ma, juz for 2mnths jer! plis!

2x p/s: da try bodek2 mama suh bagi ak bwak kete atas jlan besau. sblom ni mama just bgi drive atas jlan kmpung2 je :( pliss mama, nk drive pegi tsyn! so that ore n abe chik wont put the burden on u anymore! but u know wat mama says? 'no need la. tggu dpt lesen dluh. nnti kene same gak pyoh. xcident la. agpon, bkpo x blaja drive ngan k.long mso cuti bru ni nyo?' urh! stress! nk drive! help! sape boley buatkn license untuk sy plis? help2~

jiwa kecewa keciwa xleyh drive :(

xoxo clover

say it! face it!

2010-01-11T08:15:00.000-08:00

tenet! asal ko lambat giler eh? adushhh! stress. and today's such a tiring day. more to VERY tiring ! at the evening, got a mesyuarat agong for nusaibah *rumah sukan ijau* . luckily, the same goes wif the sumaiyah. klau x, mmg xde tman nk g makan, solat and bla3~ so, stayback ngan amani, pia, ciro, epa, rina, muna, n luvstory . so fun-fun wif them. as usual, mmg akan bgelak ktawa ngan diorang 24/7! urh, luv it. but, feels lacking sbub miera x join sme :( . it's btter if u'r there too miera! and miss edrina, trimas bkongsi crita ngan ak kt billion td! HAHA. ak cyo ko mg na, sbb tu ak oyk bout that thing ko mg. keep that as a scret, or others will think that i'm still longing for that prson, altough i'v hate that person now! *yeah, anda x silap bce, i H.A.T.E that prson. got it?*
and miss anan, ur story btween u and tutt is so much fun! urgh! should i call it romantic? yes, it's such a novel's plot. kinda romantic. mybe u should juz accept him the way he is. so mtured lah! HAHA. oke, esok smbung balek okei cito mg hok tbengkalai tuh? :D
back to the story, actually, kitorang gonna eat kt usual place, SAPUROH la! mno lagi! then,tgok2, kdai tu tutup! sial. da la kt ctu mmg xde kdai mkan yg nearer. so, we, dcided to eat kt food court, billion! *da la ak pkai ksut and x pkai stokin tyme tuh. kasut lak jnis yg agak tdedah! obvious gile xpkai stokin. malu2* HAHA. then, otw nk nek kt foodcourt tuh, met mc' shoe ngan asmaa. shoe tells me sumthing. tp tau2 la kan? i'm quite lampi! haha! xpham wat mc shoe's saying untill we reached the food court. OMG! how could that be? yeah, act, syue nk ckp die ade kt foodcourt.*dye not rfers to mc syue* and ak tnampak dye. amat2 luckily, dye xnmpak pon ak!haha. acting normal la an dpan budak2 nih. control macho jerp! nseb bek, till the end, dye xpasan my existence there! alhamdulillh.
it's just, i dun understand WHY? limaza? why did the moment i'v really set my heart up to juz frget that one, simultaneously, that person will suddenly appear and make my heart blooms back. yeah, btol2 nih! tyme ak nk bnci dan lupekan dye, dye msti hdir balek in my life. no mtter in real life *slalu tserempak!*, or in dreams skali pon.argh! god! ya allah! plis stop torturing me like this! dun ever make this annoy felling start to creep back in my heart. make my life easier plis. make the process of eliminating that person from myheart, soul and brain as easy as ABC! help me ya allah. urgh! the same happens to me about in the end-year holidei last year. the moment i hang up wif sep ni. as usual, cyam, amani, miera, dros, farah, epa, faniey, ferra, luvstory, and so on that day. i met him at the mall. wtf! i'v try all my best to avoid him, but he always be at the same place like i did! god, plis buat ak x tserempak dye lagi boley x? urrrrrrgggHHHHHHHH! plis3~ kamu jgn nakal! pegi maen jauh2 boley x? plissssssss.......

mood jiwe kacau

xoxo clover

oke! yg ni x pnjang!

2010-01-09T06:05:00.000-08:00

haha. really dun wanna write so long in this post like i always do. since so many people are saying that other posts just the way of tooooo long. HAHAHA. everytime i hear of it, i just laugh. laugh. and laugh. so, demi nk puaskn aty korang, ak tulis pendek je la k? agpom after dis gotta dinner. HAHA. nothing to say, life just go on as usual. stay in da same class. 5US. apart from diros n the 7th! but lucky to sit bside anan. HAHA. she's such a funny girl. wat a perfect deskmate! HAHA. the 7th da makin tpisah. amani ngan miera - 5UL. shiro n pia - 5UK. n me - 5US. altough tpisah but insyaALLAH we'll success together in SPM! amin! erm, wat i gonna say is I WANNA BE A BETTER PERSON! A BETTER GIRL. insyaALLAH. hope i'll be. nothim more to say or this post'll gonna be longer and longer. HAHA. bye!

p/s: oke, da pendek. stisfied? whaha.

2x p/s: en.amani AA, sy tau anda sdang mmbace. sile berikn blog anda scepat mungkin okei? sy da x saba nk mnerjah! TERJAH!~~ :D mau mntak link ngan epa, tp sokmo x ingt. aihhh~

xoxo clover

2 things to say!

2010-01-01T10:01:00.000-08:00

frst thing to say: UNO BESH!
currently very2 addicted to UNO. oww tidakk!~ spm's getting near. but still leka di alam online. tak! ni bukan salah sy. ni salah mama sbb termakan pjukan sy untok beli broadband! whaha. oke. ksimpulan kt sni, sy suke UNO. mlas nk pnjangkn citer. actually, it's my frst tyme to play this damn intresting game. thnks to fb sbb adew aplication UNO dlm fb. besh~ abis yg xrapat jd rpat. yg tpisah lame, x tego, jd tego balek. yg anggap sy smbong da oke da. thnks UNO! but hope i wont b this addicted anymore. spm la bebeh this year! S P M~ urghh~ that three words could make my brain cramped! HAHA.

***oke, da nk stat post pnjang. u btter scroll down dlu b4 dcide nk bce. plis skip to other post bleh x? da bgi wrning ni oke? xsdap xlzat post nih. skadar dtulis oleh pnulis blog hnya untuk mnyimpan mmories bout her life!**

the scond thing is: da msuk 2010!
oh no! that's mean i'll sit for spm this year. omg~ still not ready at all! c'mon. rse da tue. bfore this, kalu tgok budak2 form 5, slalu pikir dyorang da besau pnjang. and now i'm going to feel it. da tue la ak nih.. lpas spm, msuk U! urggghhhh~ cpatnye mse blalu. stil rse mcm standard 4. mse ngah2 hepy dlu. n spnjang 2009, mmg bnyk sgt kngan manis sweet leting! *8and yg bitter too* haha. t00 much. going to list it. tp xsemua la. patah la jri ak klu nk taip smua. HAHA.

- awl2 fom 4, ak msuk asrama. *tp laps tu kuar* HAHA. besh woo msuk asrma. budak2 da rmai pggil K'TEN sbb kt blok tuh mmg fom4 la yg pling besau. bangge2~

-bleyh duk stu dorm ngan mrs.basir a.k.a. ummu. first2 tu x biase sgt, sbb altough da skelas for 3years *UA genes babeh* , and mmg la kitoang rpat, tp mcm x biase sgt la nk duk sdorm. tp lpas da stu dorm ngan minah tuh, gile! dye lwak gile beb. spontaneous. sporting. da la malam2 tdow skali ngan dye. urghh~ miss her a lot! ummu, ak miss nk tdow ngan mg. miss nk kcek2 sapa lwat male2, miss nak denga cito psal basir mg! ak miss mg!

-then, tgok2 dlm list pmindhan klas tuh, ak msuk 4 UMMU SALAMAH! omg~ da la dlm tuh xde geng ak pon. amani, cyam. pia, shiro, n miera sume msuk UL. yg tggal ak ngan c.nab. chenab da jdi plaja brulang. frst2 tu mmg x leyh go on ngan environment dlm that klas. that tyme, mule rapat ngan en. NADHIRAH GHANI. mmg rpat giler. dri asrama hingge ke scula, mmg rpat ar. blik prep skali, mkn skali, g surau skali *slalu lwat, kne tulis nme*, then mmg sume skali la an. stat dri ak kuar asrama tuh, agak xrpat sgt la. almaklum lah, dlm klas jew skali kan, but stilluv u fren! for the god sake, luv u damn much besties!

- then , in my clas, in front of me, dros, ngan izzah, tggallah 3 org budak yg bnama diboh, nina, ngan ghah! w0ow~ 3 org bdak nih mmg spotim thap gaban! besh siot kwn ngan dy0rang. miss the moments we're togetha frens! da la budak2 4US sume baek2 gile. besh duk klas tuh. *but still luv UA* HAHA.

-frst tyme in my life, kne ftnah tduh amek sumone's thing. OMG~frst2 tu memg ak xsgke gak. sbb awl2 tu kitorang agak rpat la an. bual2~ then one day, one of her thing ilang. n after dat, dye da xrpat ngan ak. kinda weird mula2, sbb macm dye slalu tgok ak, jeling ak , n wat so eva! till la one day nih, i found a letter in my notebook. mse tu olidey. ak dtng nk amik bku wat balik. then, belek2 that book, tjumpe la letter tuh. after reading it, omg! bia bt0l. trus jtuh airmate ku. btol2 x sngke dtduh sdmikian. mmg sdih giler arh. xsgke she could blame it on me ats khilangn mende tuh! then, i reply that letter. giv it to her. ak mmg sumpah la ak x amek that thing. se'jella' *sile bce dlm kelate ye* mne pon ak nih, i'll neva take others pnye brang oke! i explained everythim to her. then dlm 1 week after that, she rep blik gune msg dlm fs. n she said that dye da tau bukan ak yg amek. n she's really sorry wif that. n dye hrap things will goes well as usual! keeseokan tuh, ak dan dye just btego sapa as usual. alhamdulillah~ thnk god! at least ftnah ats ak tuh bleyh diclearkn.

- then, for the frst tyme in my life, FALL IN LUV wif sumone! arh! gile! sial! nyesal~ ye, sy thu sy boloxx sbb mse umo 16 bru penah rse cmne prasaan jtuh chenta. *sblom ni just suke je kot.HAHA* . xkesa la org nk kte sye kolot or wat so eva sbb xsuke mlibatkn dri ngan things like this, but, i'm just hepy to be myself oke! no need la nk jd copycat. nk ikot cam other teens, nk couple2 or wat so eva! no need la bebeh! HAHA. just luv to be me. n very2 rgret for falling for u encik. nyesal xtkate. and i'll sound damn stupid if i say that i still cant forget u! yeah! dunno why, but i still care for u. hope i not this foolish. ak hope kau x lgi msuk dlm idup ak. mmpi ak. ko thu x, altough khdiran ko dlm mmpi pon effects me a lot. huh! sial!~ plis blah.

- frst tyme in my life, akmsuk kwad! altough it's very2 tiring, mmg amat yg x tekate, tp amat2 enjoy! da la sumer ahli2 skuad KRS sporting2. besh siot bleh coperate ngan korang! kitorang siap g wakil klantan kt level kbangsaan. altough xleh wat balek victory, tp amat puas hati. and wakil KRS laki klntan is from SMK long gafar. lucu siot dyorang, altough skuad naim ngan long gafar slalu gaduh2. HAHA. tyme nk tggu rslt level kbngsaan tuh, kitorang kene bbaris tepi skuad navy smk kedai buloh. adoyaii~ gile! kuat gile keno mapuh! *kmbali ke vrse klate* sep yo oyk sep naim bolop sbb kaloh kwad kptraan sblom tuh. actually, naim mmg juara btahan kwd kptraan for 5 years la kan. tup2, this year, kalah! HAHA. dyorang caba nnti 2010, suh sep naim mnang. slah sorang bdak ni ckp, klu klah jgak, kene bg bdak2 naim pnye no. fon kt dyorang. tobat eyh gilo sep tuh. whuhhh! gudluck la sapo2 wakil naim 2010. wat molep! haha. da la xckup ngan tuh, dyorang siap mapuh ak ag sbb duk texting tyme tuh. bdak tu ckp 'ni la bdok skoloh agamo. dey lagi duk mesej nge gewe' HAHA. bukan ngan gewe la sial! ngan that **** jah. sje, boring, kbtulan dye anta msg, so ak lyn jerp! whuhu~

- da stat jd a true real girl tyme nih. da xbolop2 cam form 2 dlu. reti mekap2 la sket. haha. nk tutup imperfection pde muke, and so on. that's a process of life rite? HAHA.

- taun ni ak rse ak nanges a lot sbb others. so fequently nangis sbb skit ati ngan org len. HAHA. lembik siot ko! tp sysly 2009 la taun pling bnyk sy cry. mmg snstiv siot la. hahahahaha. cnt stop laughing. dunno why i'm this foolish! LOL~

-and the most important thing tis year is.. i've realised how much i luv bout my frens. how much should i care bout them. and i've learnt that we shouldnt be so egois to show our luv to frens. ngan frens je oke. ngan llaki, ego msty kene high! syang 7th girlz ketat2. CHE10. PIA. AMANI. SHIRO. MIERA. CHEYAM. CHENAB! no mtter wat, i'll always luv u buddy!

actually, bnyk gilr ag! tlalu bnyak ag, bout memories wif that guy. wif my fren. HAHA. but the tyme now is 4.56 am. whuhh~ gile. mate da stat nk pjam! sory! but i need a sleep too oke.

nothim more to say, but goodbye 2009. smoger kau blalu pegi bsame kngan2 bruk yg lalu. tggalkn ak whai kngan bruk. ak da x sggup idup btemankn ko lagi. just leave me alone oke? buhbye~

p/s: ak xhau ape yg ak tgah mraban nih. so many grammatical errors. HAHA. let it be la. ak mnulis dlm keadaan spruh seda nih. mate mmg sumpah nk pjam tp tgn ni stil mau naip ugak. degil la ko!! abaikn shaja ape yg ak tulis nih. korang g bace tu knape. HAHA. sory! da mlas yg amat. LOL~

xoxo clover

jari mlas nk tekan keyboard, otak mlas nk piki~

2009-12-24T10:47:00.000-08:00

1:33 am

25122009

h0h0h0~ merry christmas!

sounds a lil bit lazy rite? hell yeah, ak mmg pmalas pon. haha. stelah 2 hari di perak n 5 hari di kl , bermkne da 7 days x online. whuhh~ jiwe amat tseksa. xpcially when in perak. boring siot weh duk kt sne. da la duk homestay. xleyh g kuar mne2. at that moment, mmg jiwe kacau bilau yg trlampau! tp agak besh la an. sbb kt sne jd rpat ngan cousins n so on. dpt bual2. sbb kitorang xrpat sgt pon ecely. whuhh~ lepas slesai pminangan n ptunangan pak muda, my fmily trus mlencong ke kl **actually i'm really2 confuse, betunang ke meminang eyh?** haha. okie, dsbabkan tonite mmg skit sgt org on9, n mulut da mula trnganga luas *nguap la wei* so it's sign that..that..that..oke! cukup! bt0l2 xhau nk ckp ape.haha. gnie2, let's skip to kl trus la.

uishh~ time kt kl aitu mmg otak da sarat-marat *wjud ke this word?* nk tulis sal kl nih. hepy yg tramat tyme duk kt sne. frst2 tu mmg agak kboringn la. since tyme tu kitorg mnginap kt hotel peninsula residence kt dmansara. n abah booked an apartmen there. it's quite comfortable there la an. tp the location! thumbs down! xde shopping complex pon skita tuh! adushh!!~ pstu kit0rg move kt quality hotel. fuhh! tyme duk cnie mmg besh siot lar.. as the location tu just a stone's throw away from sogo, pertama complex and bla3, so we juz walked there. n mmg sampai 7-8 kali ak pegi sogo. altough da agak boring ronda2 sogo tp at leaz bleyh SHOPPING! yeah! c'mon baby. shopping besh giler! smpat la shopping sket2. tp tramat2 regret coz x beli bag aitu! ad0ii~~nyesal3! n lpas tu mmg hsrat tsimpan kt ati nk pegi sunway lag0on, hving fun thre an.. then, bile smpai.... giler! rmai siot org weh! so, x jd la. just pegi round2 kt sunway pramid. tg0k2 org iceskating. besh3~ mau j0in tp mama ckp tkot jtuh, nnti sakit xpsal2. haha.

actually i really2 wanna go to BERJAYA TIMES SQUARE! mau pegi level 5. beli kp0p stuffs. tp apakan daya, kitorg x pegi pon sne! huh~ ! nk pegi~~ oke, lupekn. yg blalu xbrulang rite..

da la tyme duk quality hotel tuh, kene tman my adeks g swimming pool. adoii~ wish i were anak bongsu. haha. tknak2~ nnti mama pampered lak. xma0 la! haha.kbtulan tyme kitorg g pool tuh, slalu jew krew2 drama ape ntah ngan wat shooting. besh siot tgok diorang blakon. whuhh~ then dlm that drama, fizow pon involved skali la an. mula2 tu nk pegi snap2 picca ngan dye. then lpas my sist ckp dye cam shombong2 gitu, n he smokes, trus ilang hjat dhati nk snap3~ haha. tyme my sist jumpe dye kt pool tuh, i were in sogo. ngah shopping2 ngan mama. whuhhh~ besh3 shopping ngan mama. she understands me a lot. da la taste kitorg nk sme gtu. besh la. ily mama ♥.. oke, da tsimpang jauh from my point to say bout fizow n wat so eva tuh. the point is : I HATE SMOKERS! n many girls do rite? i just cant get it why guys call it 'COOL' if they smoke. urghhh!~ enough! dont wanna talk bout it again.

n tyme kt sne, i dreamt bout him. should i call myself crazy? gile? sial? asal k0 stil nk mncul dlm mmpi ak huhh? urgh! let him b la. tknak ckp bnyak2. i've promised myself. i've promised my soul. i've promised my heart. *not going to tell wat i'm promised bout. nnti rmai bdak2 nih wat andaian mcm2. whuhh~*oke, no mtter wat, life should b g0 on rite. c'mon cheten! this is not the end of the world oke.

ENOUGH! based on the tittle 'jari mlas nk tekan keyboard, otak mlas nk piki~' tuh, i supposed to write a short post jew rite? tp da otak stil nk tulis, so i just keep going on. n to en. bla3~ keep urself away from me plis. sy da btol2 srabut ngan awk tau x? pliss jgn kcau sy ag bleyh x? sy da bt0l2 srabut!plis3~ ko x cool la beb. kdg2 tu rse ugak ksian kt ko sbb ak xrep msg ko, tp ak da mmg btol3 xnak lyn org mcm k0! why cant u get it?

p/S: congrates to sumer studs yg amek pmr dis year n get straight A's xpcially to naimians =) altough a lil bit drop from kitorg pnye rslt last yerr, tp da kire ok la an. last year bbdak naim get 94 org 9A. this yer 75. huhu~ maahad pompuan terror weh! they got 89 studnts for 9A! w0o~ da lbih dri naim! hebat2~ n maahad laki plak 24 stdnts 9A. oke la tuh korang. xyah nk compare2 sgale la. bsyukur dgn ape yg korang boley. at leaz u've give all u got rite.

2x p/s: mama da msuk my ro0m tkdi. nseb bek dye x ngepep. haha. lupe nk salam n hug mama skni. whuhh~ bia la ma. es0k jew la k? haha. love u ma! luv abah! n all my siblings. i keep wondering why did most of the people say that the person that they love the most is their lover. but i think fmily is more impotant rite? haha. really sayang my family a lot! =D

cheten clover ♥

who cares? xoxo ♥

of being a grandchild .

the OLD me and a BETTER me .

I give you the honour to give the tittle.

i'm not HOT. I'm just HOTTEST .

Here I Am . 4-leaves clover .

Just if I have a car .

it's not goodbye .

The answer for the post below .

Going back to my Heimatstadt .

damn noisy class with the CS thing .

First post in German and dont laugh .

schwach .

dont .

my dad is always better than your dad .

without words .

Sadness, unconsciousness and passport.

with tittle or without ?

the mom and daughter talk .

step by step .

i'm not promising, but i'll try .

crying wont just be enough for this .

the reason is YOU.

What should be done?

weirdo.

put a smile on my face.

hear me when i say i believe

i changed my mind.

heyaheyaheya.

when i hope the things will get better.

i'm still, a human. an imperfect human.

the felling of afraid that still conquering me.

when the emotions get twisted.

nothing's on my mind.

it's up to me.

what do you think?

this is what i thought andd, no offense.

guess what baby?

sumpah. saya takut !

single is the bestt yawww

einstein i fell in love and i hope i dont !

i am OKAY :| *emo and dont read it !

ntah ape ape ;(

life wasn't a FAIRYTALE !

mood swing ! sigh**

fatin nabilah ! sila jadi rajin !

doi doi ! ~

wuuuuuu !~

*exam.MODE*

yes i am.

why? why? T.T

grrr *hadoyaiiii

yeay ! finally.

saya dah letih.

update?

yang terlewatkan ;l

heyy you. i'm not a perfect person okay?

i closed my eyes, and your faces lingered in my mind.

what should i do then?

saje?

nk tulis lagi?

ta tawu nk cakap ape.

life?

exam ! exam ! my life's just all bout exam! sigh*

dunt make me change my mind.

weh! boring !

yeay! berBLOGGING lagi!

separuh jiwaku pergi

listen to ur heart! not mind!

dont stop me!

jiwe haprak kosong kacau bilau

fun day!

arh!

imperfection

smbungan post below. *ttinggal!*

say it! face it!

oke! yg ni x pnjang!

2 things to say!

jari mlas nk tekan keyboard, otak mlas nk piki~

exam.MODE

smbungan post below. ttinggal!